I Walk Alone (Winter's Walk)

I Walk Alone (Winter's Walk)

A Poem by Chloe..Across the Universe
"

peaceful winter walking

"

Frosty 'morn
dawn's violet hues
bundled in wool
fleece covered feet
crunch frozen earth
I walk
solitude
repose
tranquility
serenity
peace
breathe

© 2008 Chloe..Across the Universe


Author's Note

Chloe..Across the Universe
i wrote this a few months after joining this site.. someone told me poetry need not have a lot of words
this was my first attempt to cut back on a flowing mind.. this was when this site was in its golden days.

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Featured Review

Of what you've written thus far, this is one of my favorites. It feels natural - like there's a moment's passion in it . . .(almost like William Carlos Williams' Red Wheelbarrow:so much dependsupona red wheelbarrowglazed with rainwaterbeside the whitechickens.My only suggestion is that you reconsider the last six words . . . I like the word "repose" but the words tranquility, serenity, and peace came across to me as kinda' repeatitive and don't seem to add any additional insight per line as another descriptive word might do (I would offer suggestions, but . . . ) . . . Does that make sense? I have already been out this morning, had the cold dew on my bare feet (chasing my puppy); I can tell that the sun's quickly heating up a sheer blue sky . . . I'm so glad that the ground is no longer frozen in the mornings, but then your little poem made me miss it a little . . . ;) Thanks for sharing.

Posted 16 Years Ago


13 of 13 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

can we hold hands and walk together :D LOL

Posted 16 Years Ago


9 of 11 people found this review constructive.

Ah, this is the type of piece that makes me wanna visit Mt. Fuji, or some other such place. You spark some pretty damn luminous images is such a short time. Are you a hypnotist by any chance, Chole? This one's going in my favorites....

Posted 16 Years Ago


12 of 12 people found this review constructive.

I like this because it's simple and so is nature. I know in the hustle and bustle of everday life I forget to enjoy the beauty that is surrounding me. It's good to get away for a bit and remind yourself of that.

Posted 16 Years Ago


11 of 11 people found this review constructive.

None of us walk alone we lean on each other at diffrents points in life. As one writtter put in the footprints of Jesus ,,he to walks with you,,GBU,,RodneyRay (well written ) ; - )

Posted 16 Years Ago


10 of 11 people found this review constructive.

What a peaceful piece. I could use a crisp early morning walk. Good job.

Posted 16 Years Ago


11 of 13 people found this review constructive.

Soft and smooth...:)

B.

Posted 16 Years Ago


10 of 13 people found this review constructive.

This reminds me of that footprints poem. It talks about walking with Jesus and the guy is veiwing his life and he stops at the hardest time and he seems to be walking alone but yet he is being carried.

Sometimes we seem as tho we are walking alone or just feel alone but truely we are not.

Very Nice Write

*Katrina*

Posted 16 Years Ago


12 of 12 people found this review constructive.

It seems to me that you are no longer alone on this walk.You have awakened us to the peacful serenity that flows so wonderfully from your minds eye to ours.

Posted 16 Years Ago


11 of 11 people found this review constructive.

OMG this is so well done. I felt like i was there in person while you were walking along in solitude. It really is a very tranquil and meditative time that you have captured so perfectly.

Posted 16 Years Ago


12 of 12 people found this review constructive.

Ooh, I really like this one. I especially like how you took so many words to just describe how you felt alone on the walk. It really captivated me and brought me to your level. Though "tranquility and serenity and peace" came across as the same feeling to me. Maybe a different choice of words to lengthen the mood?

Posted 16 Years Ago


11 of 11 people found this review constructive.


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68 Reviews
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Added on February 29, 2008
Last Updated on February 29, 2008

Author

Chloe..Across the Universe
Chloe..Across the Universe

Smalltown, USA, AR



About
Sometimes i feel like an alien in a strange land..can you relate? I love people and friends are just that to me , friends-if you request me as a friend it would be nice if you read something I have .. more..

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