The Wisp, Chapter One

Sudden terror squeezed her throat shut ... it wasn’t just the eyeless sockets ... something--something that shouldn’t be there--rolled inside his skull in waves of

I

A Dream

Bara walked along the boulevard. Above her head, gentle gusts blew through layers of whispering leaves. Those with the lightest grip let go and cut red and gold traces through the air before finally settling soundlessly on the pavement below. The sun still shone brightly, but a pale moon had crested the horizon. It was a lovely evening, but Bara walked alone. Not another living soul--an empty town, at a time when the residents of Windfall were usually rushing home for dinner. How strange? 

But then, there was a very insistent tug on her sleeve. Bara looked down. A little girl, of maybe four or five years old, looked back up. 

The girl wore a red pea coat with a matching beret. Curls, not far off the shade of Bara’s own strawberry blonde, scooped down and just brushed her collar. Dark glasses with white frames--heart shaped--hid her eyes. The girl said nothing, but a single tear escaped from below the plastic rims and trailed down a plump cheek.

“Are you lost?” Bara asked her. “Do you want me to help find your mommy?” 

The little girl nodded and held out her hand. Bara reached out but was jostled from behind before her fingers could take hold. The street was full now. A steady stream of men and women pushed and shoved as they passed. Most peculiar. They all wore sunglasses.

Bara looked down again. The little girl was gone. Where? The tot now stood under the shade of an oak tree, a few meters away. A tall man, made even taller by a black top hat, had her by the arm, and she struggled to get free. Something told Bara he wasn’t the girl’s father. A protective spirit surged in her. Bara fought her way through the crowd and threw her slight sixteen-year-old body at his massive frame. The man merely stepped back, but he did let go of the girl. 

“Run!” Bara urged her. 

The girl didn’t hesitate. Her short legs took flight, and she disappeared into the crowd. Bara would get no chance for escape. 

Dark gloved hands reached out and took hold of her shoulders. She looked up, opened her mouth to protest, but never uttered a word. Because under the brim of the man’s top hat were two empty black holes where his eyes should have been. Sudden terror squeezed her throat shut, and her face screwed up in revulsion. It wasn’t just the eyeless sockets. His eyelids quivered, and for a moment, something--something that shouldn’t be there--rolled inside his skull in waves of shiny black. 

The man gave a wry smile and let out a chuckle that cracked with charge. His black hands moved up from her shoulders and took hold of her throat. His fingers stiffened. 

The realization hit. He’s going to kill me. 

Bara struggled, her flailing arms making contact with no one and nothing. The man’s smile grew wider. His grip tightened, closing off her windpipe. He lifted her from her feet. Her toes just grazed the ground below, and then she was in the air … only for a moment. His hands loosened from her throat, and Bara fell to her knees. And then the man took flight. 

With her face hidden under red-gold curls, a girl about Bara’s own shape and size held him aloft with only one arm. Curiously, she also wore a red pea coat and beret.

“She is mine,” came her hissing voice. 

Then as if the man were no more than a rag doll, she tossed him aside. Before making contact with the asphalt, he exploded in a burst of silver and screams. Charges trailed and sizzled through the air. When the sound and movement finally died down, a silver dust hung for just a second and then dropped with a surprisingly heavy thud. The wind blew away the dust, and the man was gone.

Thinking the nightmare over, Bara looked to her rescuer. Her rescuer turned her head to look at her. Bara’s nightmare wasn’t over. There stood a mirror image--same shape, size, hair, and face. A doppelganger. Everything was the same, everything but the eyes. They were black and as empty as the man’s had been. Slowly, the doppelganger cocked her head to the side. With a hand as gentle as a venomous snake, she bent down and reached out for Bara’s cheek. 

“Hush, hush,” she cooed and stroked. 

Her youthful mouth turned suddenly down, and she began to transform. Two heavy folds grew from her nose, dragging her cheeks until they sagged below her chin. Crow’s feet formed around black eyes, spreading until they reached a now grey hairline. Finally, deep crevasses pocked and ran across a once-smooth forehead. 

Bara stared at herself as an old woman.

“I am here now,” her demented double reassured. “Everything will be just fine.” 

But everything wasn’t just fine, not even close. The doppelganger smiled a very wide smile that grew wider, jaw-cracking wide. Wrinkles bent and twisted under the strain of an ever-increasing black hole of a mouth, a mouth that threatened to erase its face … suddenly it closed and returned to normal. The doppelganger turned her head as though at a sound and then back at Bara. 

“Soon,” she whispered, and then just like the man had, disappeared in a storm of silver and electricity.

The doppelganger was gone. The man wasn’t to be seen, and all the others were gone too, but Bara wasn’t quite alone. A solitary dark form approached. The dark-haired boy! 

Everything would be alright now. This boy Bara knew well. He was tall and lean with broad shoulders, his strides long. His hair, dark and wavy, shown with copper in a sun setting too rapidly to be real, but it didn’t matter because Bara forgot about the racing sun, forgot the nightmare that had just occurred. He was so close now … 

The sun slipped below the horizon. The sky disappeared into night. Bara heard her own breathing, fast and shallow. His was strong and even. She reached out. Her fingers found his warm cheek. She stepped closer, and he opened his arms. Like someone had thrown a switch, the moon lit up the sky. Stars burst through the night. His eyes, vibrantly blue, smiled down at her. His lips brushed her mouth. She returned the kiss, wishing it would go on forever. It didn’t. 

Author's Note

Reviews

[eatme]

gentle as a venomous snake = awesome
I really like the pacing. Multiple times I wanted to jump ahead to escape the suspense.
First rate.

[Pryde Foltz]

Thank you, Kleos for the compliments and the time.

[Girl Friday (Sarah W.)]

How intriguing! I particularly like the way that you had the man in the top hat as the aggressor, and then the girl comes and as a reader you think that Bara is safe, but then you throw in a curve. I like the twists and turns of this one, and then the ending...who doesn't love the idea of a "dark haired boy" striding down from heaven to save us? Well, at least I think most women would like that idea :) Also liked the last line..."It didn't", because I want to know what happens now! Have you read "Daughter of Smoke and Bone"? This reminds me a little of that idea, though the antagonists are totally different, but still reminded me of the story. Well penned.

[Pryde Foltz]

Thank you, Sarah. Yes, the dark-haired boy is a charmer. No, I haven't read the Daughter of Smoke and Bone. I'll look it up.

[TL Boehm]

wonderfully penned. Love the description of the hollow eyed man and the doppelganger - the disappearance of both - the tone and emotion of this is compelling.

[Silent Wolf]

I'm very intrigued by this astounding chapter, though I feel as if I hadn't gotten to know any of the characters very well except bara... I like the little girl and the last character, though. I shall read the next chapter then. :)

[Nick.B]

Interesting chapter, feels like a fantasy (reminded me of an old song) great description and very deep, great job

[Pryde Foltz]

Thanks for stopping by and having a read. I'm glad you liked.

[Slevin Kelevra]

Definitely feels like reading a dream, a dream with hidden meanings.loved it :)

[Pryde Foltz]

Thank you for taking the read, Slevin. And I am so happy you enjoyed it.

[ZacCrampton]

Pryde, I am very glad you requested I read this yet even more glad I have. I love the use of description and your imagery. It's very captivating and at times even entrancing. I could see it all in my head playing as smooth as a film. I definitely look forward to another chapter. How very curious I am about the man as well as the boy. Again, thank you very much for this, quite a nice piece of art!

[Pryde Foltz]

Thank you, Zachary. Entrancing, high-praise, indeed. I'm glad you enjoyed it.

[annie lee]

god -- who wouldn't want to be compared to Bradbury!

[Pryde Foltz]

This girl most certainly does. After Shakespeare, I can't think of another writer I'd like to be compared to and given my subject matter, Bradbury is high praise, indeed.

[annie lee]

Wow. This reminds me very much of Ray Bradbury. The amorphous images, the sudden transitions from good to evil and the uncertain determinations of time and space. The reader is enveloped into Bara's predicament and feels the terror of standing on shifting sand or shards of land. Then just when she seems/feels safe, of course, she isn't: "The dark-haired boy!" How many times a hoped-for hero turns out to be as great a threat as the shifting and greedy ghosts. Wonderfully written, good, tight prose with poetic inflection (there's that Bradbury again!) and competent construction. I see no flaws, just good stuff!

[Aubrai]

It's like reading my own nightmare instead of dreaming of it. This is great. The readers have no choice but imagine everything you've written down. What'll happen next? I'll wait and find surely find out.

[Pryde Foltz]

Thanks for taking a read, Aubrai. I'm glad you enjoyed it.

[Aubrai]

i really did. Till next time. :)