Not This Time

On Santa’s knee I sat with glee,

I gave no harsh critique

But that Bunny, Mama honey ~

Boy, is he a freak!

 

First of all, he’s nine feet tall,

His eyes and teeth bizarre;

His fur’s a mess, he’s strangely dressed ~

This thing is Easter’s star?

 

By no means are jelly beans

And sweet eggs filled with creme

Worth any pic, don’t care how quick,

That’s why I had to scream. 

Author's Note

The Easter Bunny in the mall freaks me out. If I were a kid, there is NO WAY I would sit on his lap...

Reviews

[Frieda P]

HA seriously they're like fuzzy clowns, can't take either! It's sick what we put our kids through for the sake of a holiday picture....haha enjoy Rita, and thanks for the shytes and giggles.

[Rita L. Sev]

Do you know how many pics I have seen on Facebook this week featuring some terrified kid and this freaky rabbit? :) Thanks, Frieda!

[Einstein Noodle]

oh how your poems make me laugh ... great one ..great pic .. just like evil clowns, bunnies are ... i had a pet rabbit given to me when i was about 7 ..our upstairs neighbors couldnt keep it for some unknown reason (yeh right!).. it was all white ... was big .. and had red evil eyes ... and it bit .. everytime it tried to pick it up or play with it .. it bit .. with those nasty fangs and bad bunny breath ...we didnt have it very long ... i will never forget that bad rabbit
E.

[Rita L. Sev]

That is terrifying, E! Glad you got rid of Devil Bunny - but it looks like he grew up to be this creepy mall Easter Bunny, anyway! :) Happy to give a chuckle! Thanks:)

[Pryde Foltz]

By no means are jelly beans
And sweet eggs filled with creme
Worth any pic, don’t care how quick,
That’s why I had to scream.

We can always count on you to supply the best seasonal writes, and this one does not disappoint. Bunnies, yeah, what's up with that:)

[Rita L. Sev]

Ha! Thanks, Pryde. There's always some weird tradition to inspire...

[jacob erin-cilberto]

he's definitely no St. Nick...more like a weird Harvey...i think better if invisible.

[Rita L. Sev]

Agreed... it's just grotesque... Thanks, Jacob!

[The Rock And Roll Cowbo..]

hahaha, can you imagine the size of the pieces of chocolate he lays? I wouldn't want to clean up after him… what a fun piece of poetry.

[Baby Ricochet]

Giant rabbits are just creepy. That's why Mc'Donalds uses a clown as a trade mark and not a big scary a*s rabbit.

[Rita L. Sev]

Yeah, 'cause the clown doesn't give nightmares... ;) Thanks, Mark!

[J Todd Underhill]

Well written and funny as well, I love this one, and feel the same, do they just put the mall Santa Pedo-bears in a different costume come easter?

[Rita L. Sev]

Ugh, I hope not. Though, I cannot imagine who would want to don that Bunny costume. SO disturbing... Thanks, J Todd!

[kublakhan27]

Haha This is so true...to this day I hate those life-size bunnies, and I don't know how any kid could not be freaked out by them...as usual you find a way to express it in your own amused tongue-in-cheek way way. A very entertaining and very relevant piece Rita, nicely done :)

[Rita L. Sev]

Well, there is poetry in everything... and it helps allay my fear... :) Thanks, Steve!

[A. Amos]

You made me smile, good one my friend

[Rita L. Sev]

Beware the Bunny... :) Glad to give a smile - Thanks, A!

[icelandicblue]

I agree, those costumes are so creepy. Love your poem. Some things should be left alone...the Easter Bunny is not Santa. Might as well just get a clown and scare the bejeezus out of everyone. ; )

[Rita L. Sev]

This was not a "thing" when I was a kid - stores had not yet tapped into this money-maker. Better not tell anyone your clown idea - someone is likely to jump on it - and parents would actually buy into it! Thanks, Blue!

[icelandicblue]

I saw these scary Easter Bunny photos on Ellen, I thought you might enjoy them:

http://www.dump.com/easterphotos/