SO BEING YOURS.

SO BEING YOURS.

A Poem by Red Rose
"

You claimed me. I can't escape. I don't want to.

"
Who knew?
The rudiments of being owned.
A leash on the fragile heart.

Obscuring patterns 
All, between you and me.
Breathless, senses hyped.

You felt, but I felt more.
Heat. Got my heart racing.
Cold. And I'm drowning.
So very real.

Haunting whispers and commands
Thoughts synced with yours.
You lead, I follow
I'm all yours.

Caught up in your thunderstorm 
strike a thrill, I consume.
Break the absolute law
And confront the inevitable consequences.
So very much alive.

Conclusion?
You want me, but I need you.
So being yours.
You, a drug I spend my life savings on.
I take you all in.

And now I'm all, but nothing, without you.
Literally.

© 2018 Red Rose


Author's Note

Red Rose
Hmmm.. What do you think? I hope it's good enough.. It's been a while since I last wrote a poem. I haven't lost touch have I?

My Review

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Featured Review

The passion, chaos, and ache rumble through the piece.
It feels fragmented, but I think that reflects the general tumult of the inner psyche absorbing all kinds of emotions.

'Conclusion?
You want me, but I need you.'

Think that sums it up best. I also love the imagery of a heart on a leash.

The one suggestion I would give (I usu give one) - I don't think you need the last two lines.

I think ending on drug metaphor would end it more strongly. But, that's just me.

Vibrant read. Enjoyed.

Posted 4 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

The passion, chaos, and ache rumble through the piece.
It feels fragmented, but I think that reflects the general tumult of the inner psyche absorbing all kinds of emotions.

'Conclusion?
You want me, but I need you.'

Think that sums it up best. I also love the imagery of a heart on a leash.

The one suggestion I would give (I usu give one) - I don't think you need the last two lines.

I think ending on drug metaphor would end it more strongly. But, that's just me.

Vibrant read. Enjoyed.

Posted 4 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

What do you mean Not good enuf, Did you see the views do you read the comments. This has more view and comments then anything I wright then again its probably better then most things I wright. This is the new age where being normal is way over rated.

Posted 2 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Good vocab, We all need love, without love, well their would literally be no us. But your not talking about that kind of love your talking about the love that builds memorys and shapes dreams.

Posted 2 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

I absolutely love your poem! I relate to it on a personal level. Keep writing, I love it!

Posted 2 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

This is simply beautiful.

Posted 2 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

No Rose, you haven't lost your touch-- the poem is remarkable, kinetic even, which means you have almost literally put into words energy, sexual/emotional energy, the kind that powers life itself-- and you've done it bravely. I suppose the only question is, is love a chain to bind us, or wings to let us soar towards God?

Posted 2 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

I really liked this. It verbalizes a feeling in a way that's hard to touch. Thank you for this poem!

Posted 2 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Hello, Red, thank you for entering my contest!:)
Here, love seems an obsession.

Posted 2 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

This isreally good. I havent read any of your other work, but it seems like you haven't lost touch!

Posted 2 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

To answer your author's note; You haven't. Don't think so low of yourself! This poem is amazing. Dark, sad and really draws you in.

Posted 2 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


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697 Views
15 Reviews
Rating
Added on November 26, 2017
Last Updated on January 14, 2018
Tags: Just US

Author

Red Rose
Red Rose

Kandy, Central Province, Sri Lanka



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18 hyper and eccentric! (coz honestly normal is boring :P) Dream big and dream a lot. You don't always need a reason. Do it just because. #zquad ^-^ more..

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