A World Without Her

~

A million times I've shed my tears

Though still her touch I miss.

Without her death, we could have lived

Unbridled in our bliss.

Our future lives were seized by grief,

I'm hostage now to pain.

That jocund voice no longer sings,

My pleas - I cry in vain.

My fingers arc with shaky hands

The letters on her stone.

I'm puzzled why we both exist

Dissected and alone.

For I - with time - shall never rest

Nor ever feel complete

Until that day at heaven's gate

When once again we meet.

Reviews

[Thomas Fitzgerald]

A brutal sadness descends upon the reader while devouring this piece, well done, good read.

[Tim]

Thank you.

[emmajoy]

This is what i call beautiful sadness.. words that sting yet are cushioned by love, true love. Too much lost, too much left behind.. the wait, the hope of dancing across grass and seeing dog-clouds in blue skies.

You say so much, you feel too much.. you inspire the living and remind a reader that love really never ends but waits patiently..

We all meet again... all thanks to Whoever guides you there.

[DIVYA]

Hope and grief expressed in four beautifully crafted verses. The penultimate verse questions the futility of an existence without the loved one which strikes a deep chord in me. Perhaps, there is light after darkness, the joy of rapture after such profound sadness.

[Tim]

I'm sure there is DIVYA, thanks for the read.

[Shannon]

Sad tale laid out with hope, too.

This line:

Our future lives were sold to grief,

Original, unique and speaks to layers of a story untold.

[Tim]

Thank you. :)

[WittyWonka]

From title to last word, this is beautifully written and describes an all too familiar weight.

[Tim]

Thank you very much.

[aLittlePain]

Beautifully crafted piece with a sense of heaviness. The burden of being left behind, I've felt this twice in my life. This is an epic piece of poetry Autumn. R xo

[Tim]

I'm sorry to hear you're familiar with the feeling. Thank you for reading though, I appreciate your review. xo.

[Vria P Crow]

FIRST IMPRESSIONS

There is always tragic beauty in your words. The images you select are consistent with your work; this captivates the reader.

CONTENT AND FORMAT

I envisioned the speaker in a graveyard, talking to a dead lover. He or she wondered about the "what ifs" while they were together; "a boundless bliss." There was a vague sense of anger and confusion. The narrator did not understand why they remain alone. Ultimately, the speaker wanted to be with the lover in death yet I suicide was not an option. Grief stricken, the reader empathizes with he or she. I got the feeling that she was waiting to die which is far worse than taken suddenly.

CLOSING THOUGHTS

Overall, the imagery, mood, and subject matter always leaves me with a knot in my stomach. I dread when my loved ones leave me. Frankly, I would want to leave this world around the time my significant other departs. Sadly, we do not always get this choice. Thank you always for sharing!

sincerely,
ria

[Tim]

Thank you for a great review ria. :)

[Vria P Crow]

You are very welcome. :)

[Lorry]

Such heavy words, so beautifully constructed. Capturing perfectly the burden those left behind must face, as there is no choice, no pleas or arguing for a reprieve, just complete disconnection of life as it was known, but the life left lingers so much in the heart and mind of the bereaved. Wonderful piece.

[Tim]

Well said, thank you.

[Mr. Lopez]

A friend of mine said that she hasn't found many writers here who's writing truly captivated her. Well, that's probably because she hasn't read yours. This poem is text book poetry. Deeply felt and perfectly executed. The flow was impeccable and the sorrow was thick as mud. You can tell that you've been at this for a while and many could learn from your example. I very much so enjoyed every it of this. Thank you for the write.

[Tim]

You're very kind, thank you.

[Jake Hinkle]

Amazing poetry. I could feel the depths of my heart sink to the dark place of loss. Great job.

[Tim]

I appreciate your thoughts, thank you.