They Own You

They Own You

Smile;

You insignificant deceiver of existence,

-thief of reality,

Isn’t it what they all require of you?

Don’t they expect that?

Bow down to them,

They own you.

Smile;

You pathetic excuse for a life,

-thief of reality,

Isn't that what you have always done?

Don't you live off of your false perfection?

Bow down to them,

They own you.

 

Smile;

You impostor in the mirror,

-thief of reality,

Won’t they discard you if you don‘t?

Aren’t you frightened that they will abandon you again?

Bow down to them,

They own you.

 

Smile;

You hypocrite of passion,

-thief of reality,

Won’t you collapse if you don’t?

What if you shatter again?

Bow down to them,

They own you.

 

Smile;

You waste of space,

-thief of reality,

Isn’t that what you want to do?

So that you can protect what’s inside?

Bow down to them,

They own you.

Reviews

[FlawedByDesign]

Nice style and form. Sad to see the person is slave to somebody, but the truth is only weak people people succumb to the control of others.

btw...I do not understand how the questions on the 4th line of each stanza relate to the rest of the stanza, such as "Won’t they discard you if you don‘t?". How does this relate to the impostor in the mirror exactly? Is it a matter of "them" removing the mirror or the person "discarding" themselves by shedding the impostor image?

[TLK]

"...but the truth is only weak people people succumb to the control of others."

People succumb to control because of fear and pain. It is not a sign of strength to cause fear and pain to another, it is not a sign of weakness to feel it. You are wrong to that point that your comment would be taken by some as slanderous.

[~Princess~]

Wow I loved this. You're really good! Keep up the good work hun.

[Undying Glory]

man this is intriguing work. i couldn't help but think of the song "The Judas Kiss" by Metallica when i read this. good job here

[Dread Solomon]

WOW... so this is what a smile is to you... this is really good!! Ironic, because I'm always smiling...

[Dane Osborne]

A very solid piece. You have an excellent way with words and this is exquisitely expressed for somebody as young as you. keep up the good work.

[Observer]

WOW! Awesome.

[Claire Karrine]

Amazing format. I loved the repeated lines as well as the lines that seemed repeated but were different words, but the same meaning. Wonderful job

~Claire Karrine

[James Paulin]

And he (Jesus) asked him (the man), "What is thy name?" And he answered, saying, "My name is Legion: for we are many."
Legion, also known as the Gerasene Demon, is a demon referred to in the Christian Bible. The New Testament outlines an encounter where Jesus healed a man from Gadarenes possessed by demons while traveling.

My first impression. I like this poem.

[Vito XYZ]

Ah wow now that is cool. Your a genius it's clever beyond belief I maybe a in a good mood, by way to top it of with a request to read this....now the reason for this is the structure is pretty damn clever and this should be pointed out how ever before that you could have used with a conclusion just saying "Smile, Bow down to them they own you". It fits together like I roller coaster because you've made the track how ever bits can be moved but it's more fun if you end it on a high. We can read this in our mind "You insignificant deceiver of existence, You impostor in the mirror,You hypocrite of passion,You waste of space.", "Smile Isn’t it what they all require of you?, Won’t they discard you if you don‘t?, Won’t you collapse if you don’t?, Isn’t that what you want to do?", and then with "require" and "expect", "discard" and "abandon", "collapse" and "shatter", "want and protect" they're really strong words. I love your writing style

[Laura Yida <3]

this is pretty freaking awsome! i loved it!!! amazing. and yea it does sound bitter and aggressive. my kind of poem lol. :D

[Haeshin]

Whoa. This sounds bitter and aggressive.