Touch Me

Touch me with a candle,

     I'll still feel the burning flame,

Touch me with a knife,

     I'll still feel the searing pain,

Touch me with a spear,

     I'll still bleed all the same,

Touch me with a mirror,

     I'll still appear very plain,

Touch me with money,

     I'll still have little to gain,

Touch me with sickness,

     I'll still stand out in the rain,

Touch me with a cage,

     I'll still go insane,

Touch me with your heart,

     I'll not feel ashamed...

Reviews

[Brown Bull]

I hate it when a fly gets on my back where I can't reach him with my tail to swat him away. But I love butterflies and that butterfly picture is beautiful. Us bovines don't bother with mirrors too much, but I can sure identify with the cage line! Keep it up, you will be a good writer.

[Beatles9322]

This is very good and a bit twisted. When I saw the title, I thought it would be a cute and/or sexual poem. lol. But you tricked me!

[lorynrrr]

omg this is amazing i love this writing

[Antonio Valentino]

It's amazing how many things can touch us in so many different ways. This was great Kristy, it gave me much to think about. Thank you for sharing it with us.

Antonio :)

[DiMar4u]

really loved that last line--

[lawrence bear]

this is a great piece, wonderfully written.

[Laura Yida <3]

this is really good kristy. keep it up. ^.^

[J. Randall Dodd]

kristy,

i enjoyed this litany poem. the emotions were evident, the shape and flow seem alright, but only one nit. maybe it's just how i speak, but "I'll still" on all the indented lines seems a bit off to me (rhythm wise anyway). I'm not sure if your doing it for visual reasons, which might make sense to me, but when spoken, you could just leave out "still" and it would be fine.

well, that's my opinion. i do like this piece. litany poems are some of my favorites...

sincerely,
jr

[Just Charles]

I love this piece. It is easily one of my favorites since I've come back to Writer's Cafe. As a writer, a poet, one of the many things that I focus on now is rhythm, and I must say, that is one of the many things I enjoy about this poem. The rhyme scheme is splendid. I hope to keep reading your work. Feel free to send read requests if you want.

[Jibey]

Clever structure that supports the build up of ideas and then the final declaration... An enjoyable and charming read... :-)

[the_stoic]

amazing write .. esp. the last past !