Chapter Six

 

Mikey’s P.O.V

“Don’t do anything that…that would ever end your life. He still loves you ya know, says it in his sleep. He’ll never stop loving you. Give him time. He will come around.” A minute passed before Joey shook her head with tears falling from her eyes and ran off. My body wouldn’t carry me forward. I just couldn’t believe that I knew what she was going to do, but my legs did carry me back home. I had to find Gerard.

 

 I busted through the front door and ignored the looks I got from the guys. Only Frankie followed.

“Gerard!” I stopped in front of his door and banged on it. Frankie gave me a questioned look.

“Open up the damn door Gerard!” he finally did, but returned to his bed.

“Gerard we need to talk. You have to talk to Joey.” He just looked at me.

“If you haven’t noticed lover boy she’s scared almost to death of me.”

“She told me something.” I had to catch my breath.

“And what was that?” he had his nose stuck in his sketch book again.

“She told me to tell you…” I gasped again. He looked more interested. I took another two minutes to breath.

“Tell me!” he shook my shoulders with a frantic look in his eyes. I breathed regularly, finally.

 

Gerard’s P.O.V

“She told me to tell you that she misses you and no matter what happens she’ll always love you. No matter what.” Mikey got teary eyed. “No matter what.” He whispered.

“Gerard I think she’s going to hurt herself in a way you’ll never get her back again.”

“Then why the hell did you come here!” I yelled and got up to look out the window.

“She ran off to quickly. I couldn’t stop her. She wouldn’t listen to me. I told her that sooner rather than later you would come around. I told her you still loved her, too.” I didn’t turn around. The thing I so desperately wanted to tell her earlier wouldn’t mean a single thing to her now. Now that she was dead.

 

Joey’s P.O.V

 I ran up the drive way with my guitar case in hand and ran to my window. I had left it unlocked and now I was really glad. I pushed it up as quietly as I could and jumped through.

I knew I was in a state of deep depression and insanity, but I didn’t care.

I knew I shouldn’t be doing what I was going to do, but nothing could stop me now.

This nightmare was going to end.

I knew where all the knives where in the house. So I got one, the smallest we had and went to the bathroom and closed the door. I locked it and propped something against it so no one could bother me. With one glance at the knife I knelt down and brought the blade upon my wrist. I gasped when the blood ran red and quick down the drain of the tub. I did it again. One for my real father, two for mikey, and three for Gerard; by now the tub was filled with blood. In my pain I laughed and I cried. There was nothing in the world that meant anything more than this; the end of Joey Candice Parker. My head began to fill dizzy so I left the stained blade on the floor and hung my head over the tub. My parents were out of town for the night. I kind of felt bad to what they would come home to, their own daughters rotting body in the bathroom, but I found myself not caring about anything really. In a sense I wished I would have written a note to the people I loved. Gerard was taken care of; I would be seeing my father soon so he was done also, and I had kissed my mikey today hadn’t I?

 In the house I couldn’t hear anything. It was quiet. The dishwasher wasn’t going, the washer and dryer were quiet, and all of the fans in the house were off; everything was still. I’d rather have a quiet death than a noisy one. I sat there for a few minutes. The slits in my wrists didn’t seem deep enough so I deepened them. I welcomed the pain with wide arms and a nice bed. After a few more minutes I noticed something that wasn’t there before. A new sound, something loud, and something that wasn’t supposed to be there; it took me a few more minutes to realize it was screaming. Whatever it was was screaming my name, running up the stairs, jiggling my bathroom handle. I was in a state of panic. Before I was going to die, since I was so close, I dipped my hand in my own blood and wrote on the mirror ‘I love you, Ge’. I couldn’t finish the other E because I collapsed on the floor. The last thing I remember was blood on the white bathroom door and Gerard screaming my name.

 

Gerard’s P.O.V

 “Joey! Joey! Joey, no Joey, don’t do it!” my feet weren’t carrying me to her room fast enough. I just knew we would be too late. Why did I have to leave her? Because of my ignorance to her affection towards me she was probably lying on the floor dead. I rammed my shoulder into the bathroom door, but it didn’t budge. Mikey was standing behind me.

“Mikey, go call 911!” I held on to his shoulders for a minute and looked into his sad eyes. “Go now!” I pushed him off as gently as I could. He was terribly upset. I looked around the room for some kind of coin to unlock the door. Joey didn’t plan on fighting for her life, but I did. Finally, I found one and unlocked the door, but it still wouldn’t open all of the way. Smarty had probably braced the door, so I slid my hand through the crack and pushed what seemed to be a chair out of the way. Something hard hit the floor with a loud thud. I sucked in air, bit my lip, and walked in. It was a bloody mess in here; blood stained the floor, inside the tub, and on the mirror. Wait, what did the mirror say? I knew it was my entire fault. When I looked around I didn’t see anything or anyone, but then I looked behind the door. That’s what had fallen; it was Joey. Her lifeless body seemed to scream out at me, yelling at me saying ‘This is your entire fault!’ I fought tears the whole way down to her.

“Joey? Joey, talk to me.” I brushed her hair back with my hand, pressed it against her forehead, and even her forearm; her arm twitched.

 

Joey’s P.O.V

 I could only see white splotches in my eyelids, but I could feel, and hear something. My arm risked a twitch. His voice echoed through my dormant ears; Gerard’s voice. Something shockingly warm pressed itself against my skin. Ah, I wanted to keep it there it felt so good. My body was so cold. All I could manage was to wiggle my pinky finger and he squeezed my hand.

“I’ll get you out of this.” Again, his lovely voice pierced my ears. Inside, I smiled at the sound.

 

Gerard’s P.O.V

 I had a feeling in my gut that she could hear me again or maybe just tell I was there so I squeezed her hand. She struggled to swallow and coughed quietly. Once I had dried my eyes I slid my hand under head with the other under her knee and lifted her up; she was even lighter than I expected. Two weeks of anorexia had done a number on her. No, wait. Four weeks of anorexia. On the way to the kitchen her tiny and cold hand cupped my warm cheek. Her hands were like ice.

“Gerard.” Her voice was barely more than a whisper. I suppose my ears were tuned to her voice because I heard it.

“Shh.”

“I love you, Gee.” For once Joey’s eyes opened to look at me, her blue eyes were striking against her skin, they flickered between both of mine and then squeezed shut and her head rocked to the side, leaning against my shoulder. This brought back many memories. Like basically the first time I had interacted with her for a long period of time, she fainted, I would never forget it. Mikey came mopping behind me, but when he saw Joey in my arms his eyes lit up.

“She can’t be…” he touched her fingers. They were so pale. I was going to say something to mikey, but apparently I hadn’t heard the ambulance and now EMT’s were flooding Joey’s living room. They let me set her on the gurney, but after that, with only one look at her pale and lanky figure, they strapped her in and started hooking her up to a number of things.

“What did you tell the people on the phone?” frank had come to join us with a shaking mikey under his left arm.

“That it looked like our friend had tried to commit suicide, but she was on the bathroom floor and still alive.” Frank looked down, still trying to stabilize mikey. The word suicide sent me shaking in my shoes. The blonde haired EMT waved us in the vehicle. Mikey and frank sat near the back, but I sat as close to Joey as possible, which was right by her head.

 About thirty minutes later we arrived at the hospital. Of course they made us sit in the waiting room so they could stable her condition. Sitting there and not being able to do anything while the one I loved was in her worst condition was the worst torture I think you could bring down on someone. Mikey was getting pretty emotional so I sat beside him.

“I knew I should have followed her. I could have stopped her.” He must have been in a state of shock because we all knew it was my fault.

“Mikey, it was my fault. You know that.” He looked up at me really quickly.

“I could have stopped her.” His fingers shook in his lap. I sighed, patted Mikey’s knee and walked up to the front desk.

“Could you call room 109, please? I want to know if we can come see Joey Parker.”

“Of course.” She smiled, picked up the phone and turned around. I could only hear a few muffles and then Joey scream in the back ground. I bit my lip and looked away, fighting tears. She must hate needles.

“Yes, you may go back there. Go down this hall and turn right and then left and you will be there.” She smiled and I walked off to get mikey and frank. I waved through the glass and frank practically picked mikey up and carried him out the door to her room. We just walked in. mikey ran to Joey’s sleeping body at the bed. Hesitantly, he picked up her fingers and rubbed them with his thumb. For a long five minutes she didn’t respond. I looked at all of the wires they had hooked up to her. How could I have done this to her? Why did I have to be selfish in a way that would make her hurt herself?

 Mikey was laying his head on Joey’s stomach, about to fall asleep, when I saw her start to rub his hair. I don’t think I’ve ever seen him respond to anyone so quickly. Mikey looked so speechless it was almost funny. Yes, I said funny. Joey’s eyes were still closed and she smiled. Her face was swollen from all of the medication and the light in the room made her look so unhealthy. I shifted my feet and sat down in a hard chair and breathed deeply. I leaned my head back on the wall and closed my eyes. It was nice to finally know she was safe even though I wasn’t having anything to do with her right now, she was still safe, but she must have heard me.

“Gerard?” her little hand flopped uselessly on the bed sheet. At first, I just sat and pretended to not hear her pitiful whisper.

“I know you hear me.” She paused and stopped rubbing Mikey’s head. “I wanted to say I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have done it. People have gone through worse. People have had family members die and die again, one after the other. All I was dealing with was a little break up and I crumbled. Crumbled so low that I decided death was the best way out of everything, but there’s no way in getting out of this. Out of whatever is in store for me; whether it be good or it be bad, there’s no way out. The pain will never stop. He’ll keep doing it and doing it again and again and over and over.” Emotions I can’t even put into words surged through my body. What was she saying? This was absurd. We all knew it was my fault, that it wasn’t her father’s fault. We all knew it. I knew it and so did she.

“You know it is all my fault. Need I remind you what was on the mirror?” she opened her swollen, blood shot eyes.

“Truth was on the mirror, Gerard. If anyone was going to find me, I wanted them to know to tell you that I love you.” Tears didn’t even stream down her face.

“You still wouldn’t have done that if I hadn’t fallen in love you and then met that girl and decided to have happy hour! You would be home, in bed, maybe with me, but no I had to be selfish and take all of that away from you. And now on your permanent record will be the day you tried to commit suicide. People look at that as insanity, craziness, madness. And what the world won’t know is the true story; that your friend was the cause. Me, I’m the cause.”

“Do you want to be the cause, Gerard Austin Way? Did you know that meeting you and mikey was the highlight of my life so far? If you even were remotely close to being the cause, I wouldn’t have let you in, but you aren’t. So there; but when they ask me what the cause was for my actions I’m not telling them anything.”

“Oh yes you are. You’re going to tell them it was my entire fault. It’s too obvious.”

“No. I. Am. Not.” Joey had gritted her teeth and locked her eyes into mine before falling back on the bed. Frankie walked in the door.

“Hey candy.” Frank looked over our expression and gave me one of those you-will-tell-me-later kinds of looks.

“Hey frank, I’m terribly sorry.”

“Would you care to give him your little speech again, Joey?” I sneered.

“Gerard. Get. Out.” Joey didn’t say it with angry eyes or an angry expression. She was actually crying, but I went on anyway.

“I’ll be right back.” Mikey promised. He followed me out into the hall.

“What the heck is your problem?” he yelled.

“She knows it’s my fault.”

“Maybe she’s right Gerard, maybe you do want to be the cause. I’m just not sure about you sometimes.” He started to walk off, but I had had enough. I tangled my hands in his shirt and shoved him against the window-less wall.

“Do you know how it feels to get three hours of sleep every night worrying whether or not the one you know you want to love, but can’t bring yourself to it, is okay? You don’t know how hard it is for me to look at her and not think I’m a horrible person. You just don’t know.” I set him down, still fuming.

“I knew you loved her.” He whispered.

“Yes, mikey, I do, but I can’t.” hadn’t I said this before?

“What do you mean, ‘can’t’? Anyone can love anyone.”

“It’s like I’m the Romeo and she is Juliet. We just aren’t meant for each other and unlike their ending, ours won’t be happy.”

“Maybe she feels the same way about you Gerard, except she took the chance and jumped right into your arms.” He paused, almost unsure if he should say something, but he did. “I was talking to her a few weeks back about how she used to be really popular and then her friends stopped calling, stopped caring, and then her father died. They had the funeral and a month later her mother was engaged to a man she hardly knew. She lost all of the trust she had in people, in humans alone. She didn’t talk to anyone and no one talked to her. Her parents had a few feuds and then the baby and then her mother was soldered to her fathers bind. They couldn’t break it up. He wouldn’t sign the divorce papers. Her mother, Diana, doesn’t even know what her father planned and now that it is all done and over with Joey just gave up, gave up on trying protecting her mother and the baby and everything that mattered to her. You know her step-father burned all of the things of her real father? You seemed like the best thing that had happened to her; in fact she even said “Gerard is the most amazing person I have ever met. You just don’t meet many like him anymore.” Gerard I wish you knew how much she loves you. How much she cares about you, but also how much she needs you. She needs someone like you, Gerard.” Mikey stopped. I hadn’t heard him talk so much in a long time.

“I know.” Was all I could say. I knew he understood by the head shake he gave me.

“I’m going home.” I said and left.

 

Joey’s P.O.V

 Unlike surviving a car crash and being uncomfortable, I was uncomfortable in one of those don’t-feel-good-in-your-own-shoes kind of way.

“I thought we had lost you, Candy. You have to promise never to do anything like that again.” Frankie was being so sweet, rubbing my forehead and the top of my hand. Mikey opened the door which let in a whole bunch of cold air.

“Trust me frank I don’t plan on it. This whole ordeal has been enough for me.”

“Gerard left.” Mikey sighed and sat down on the other side of the bed.

“Oh.” That made me really sad.

“Did he go home?” frank asked.

“Yeah. I guess that’s where he said he was going, but you know how he is.”

“I’m going after him. Take care, Joey.” Frank smiled, kissed my hand and strolled out the door with a determined look on his face.

“Mikey?”

“Uh huh.” He looked so drained.

“Will you press the nurse button?” I laughed and he did. The nurse came running in seconds later.

“Yes, dear?”

“I am starving. Can I eat? Please!” I managed to get a chuckle out of mikey; this would be harder than I thought. The nurse laughed too and ran off to get me some crackers and sprite.

“Be happy, mikey, please.” I rubbed his hand.

“What was it that you told me a few weeks ago about Gerard?” mikey must have been thinking about something else or staring off into space at my b**b, ugh. Suddenly, I remember what we talked about. Gerard was out and mikey and I where having a great time just talking in his room when he started asking certain questions.

“Gerard is the most amazing person I have ever met. He highlighted my whole moving experience and made it a lot easier. He’s got the best personality a girl could wish for. He’s someone you could easily fall in love with.” I paused. “I told you I loved him, but I don’t think he loves me. He seems stuck, like a brick wall is keeping him from saying anything.” I choked up and pushed back the tears, but couldn’t keep them. I flooded over with emotions I had been holding up for weeks, months, maybe even years!

 

 

Mikey’s P.O.V

 I pushed the stop button on my phone under my knee. I had recorded what Joey had said and planned on sending it to Frankie. A txt message came through from Frankie.

-I see him-

-Alright, it’s like 30 maybe 40 secs long, make sure he is listening.-

 

Gerard’s P.O.V

 I collided head first with Frankie in the street.

“Get off!” I yelled and pushed him down on the ground. His cell phone slid out and opened. I was going to squish it, but I heard Joey’s voice.

“Gerard is the most amazing person I have ever met. He highlighted my whole moving experience and made it a lot easier. He’s got the best personality a girl could wish for. He’s someone you could easily fall in love with.” She paused. I heard the thick emotion in her voice. “I told you I loved him, but I don’t think he loves me. He seems stuck, like a brick wall is keeping him from saying anything.” She stopped again, the emotion getting thick, and then I heard her cry. She must have been saving them up. They sounded harsh on her sick lungs. It all brought me to my knees. I couldn’t move. Frankie picked up his phone and shut it.

“You have to go back.”

“I can’t.” as hard as it was for me to say, I said it.

“Yes, Gerard, you have to!” Frankie yelled. “I’m not asking you to see Joey, I am telling you.” He pulled me up by my shoulders and practically kicked me to the hospital. It was long, but we finally got there. The help desk chicks gave frank and I the weirdest looks, but we kept going. When we got to her door I chickened out and ran the other way. To my surprise Frankie didn’t even follow. He just let me run. I went home.

 

One week later…

 

Joey’s P.O.V

 I was so glad to be out of the hospital and be back at school. Since I didn’t have very many friends that didn’t already know what had happened I didn’t have to talk about the incident very much. School was rough though because Gerard hadn’t started talking to me yet and he was in almost all of my classes. He never even looked at me, not even once. It started to bother me after a few days, but finally I started talking to other people and just ignoring him completely.

 I was sitting at lunch with a girl I talked to one day when something strange happened.

“He’s staring at you again.” Kayla was my best friend; she knew everything that had happened and all about my dad. She was my only girl friend.

“What?” I hissed, as we walked to our lunch table.

“Gerard, that one kid, is staring at you again.” I figured she was messin with me, but she wasn’t, there he was staring a hole into my side.

“Well stop looking at him!” I screeched and hit her upside the head. She giggled and sat down.

“Did you two go out? I forgot.” I sighed.

“No we never did. We just engaged in, touching, if you wish.”

“Why did you two split?” she munched on her cheeseburger and looked at me.

“I don’t know. He went out with someone else and then completely ignored me. I miss him though.” I nibbled on my fries and stared off into space.

“He is really hot. Maybe you should talk to him again.” I choked on my French fry and stared at her.

“Are you crazy!?” I nearly yelled.

“Maybe insane I’m not sure. The doctors don’t know yet either.” She grinned widely. Kayla was one for making jokes at the wrong time when I really needed her. I slapped my forehead and let my fingers slide down my face and then sighed.

“Look since its Friday I’ll come over to your house for a sleep over and then we can stalk him, okay?” she giggled.

“You can come over, as long as you don’t mind me dragging you over to Mikey’s house.”

“Lemme guess…his brother?”

“They’re equally hot; you’ll have something to stare at. Sides Frankie isn’t that bad either.” I got up to throw my tray away, but it was right beside Gerard, so I made Kayla throw hers away too.

“You’re pathetic. You should just talk to him.” She said when we were over by Gerard. I pulled her away.

“Shut up or I’m stuffing you in my guitar case and throwing you into my parent’s closet.”

“Why in your parent’s closet?”

“I don’t know, because it’s really dark in there and you’re scared of the dark, so hah!” I yelled down the hall. We laughed and she chased me down to our class through the angry teenagers.

 

 School was finally over and Kayla and I were getting on the bus.

“It smells so bad on here.” She pinched her nose as we walked by the bus driver.

“Kayla, if you don’t hush you are going to get us kicked off.” We both giggled and made our way to the back. The bus ride was bumpy, but it usually is. It took longer to get home. The worst part of getting off the bus was passing Gerard, but with Kayla I did it with no problems.

“Very good grasshopper, you have completed test one,” she paused, “Of three hundred! Muhahaha!” And ran across the yard; we chased each other around my house for about ten minutes and jumped on each other and fell about the yard. I fell and giggled loudly before Kayla tripped on my foot. We both laughed uncontrollably for two minutes. I sighed.

“You’re hilarious.” I exclaimed tiredly.

“Yes yes I know, doll. Now Gerard Way’s smexy brother…when shall we be going to see him?” she tapped her finger tips together and tried to look cynical. I just busted out in laughter.

Author's Note

Aww yay everyone happy again!!!!

Reviews

[X_Emo_Princess_X]

That was good! I really like this story. I'm going to be sad when it ends. I'm glad she has a friend.
And I don't know if this was done on purpose, but Gee's middle name is Arthur not Austin.