A Poem by afra

The person who will fight the world for me 
The person who means everything to me
The man who always there to wipe my tears 
The man who always fights away my fears 

The angel who showed me how to love 
The angel who protected me when I was weak as a dove 
The guy who spent his teenage life working for me 
The guy who lives in hell just to give me a happy family 

The hero who burns himself just to give me light 
The hero who always shows me the right 
The dad without him I don't know where I would be
The dad who's little girl I am proud to be 

© 2012 afra

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Again, with so many reviews on the shelf there's probably little I can add. And if someone else already mentioned what I'm about to say, forgive me and move on. One question on the content or story line. In the middle verse you mention the "guy who spends his teenage life". Was this still referring to your dad? Also, the third line you could say 'The man who will always wipe my tears'. The next-to-last line instead of "The dad without him" you might say 'The dad without whom'. Your poem is wonderful as is. I'm just trying to offer something. I don't think it's right to just mouth repetitious praise like a rubber stamp on everyone's work. My honest opinion I will always give, only after I've actually read a piece several times and given it careful thought.

Posted 8 Years Ago

3 of 3 people found this review constructive.


8 Years Ago

I agree with the "whom"
Also I am assuming that your dad was young when you were born; hence, .. read more


Such sentiment, a lovely tribute to your Dad!
Nicely done!

Posted 7 Months Ago

That's so beautiful !!!!!!!!!!!! Show it to your dad, I bet he's gonna love it !! Amazing poem =D

Posted 8 Years Ago

Awwh, such a lovely tribute to your daddy. It's great to appreciate the guy that helped bring you into this world. I try to with my dad everyday as much as I possibly can.I actually wrote a poem about my dad once or twice. I read them to him and he really enjoyed both of them. Afra, this is sweet and wonderful. Definitely well-written, keep up the good work! :)

Ashley Rivers-- Keep writing! :D

Posted 8 Years Ago

So touching, I love it. I like the rhyme you made, it fits till the end and the ending was truly amazing. Writing about parent's love is always true and pure, great job and keep at the good work...

-Urosh Stojanovic

Posted 8 Years Ago

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Great job. Very heartfelt:)

Posted 8 Years Ago

Aw touching especially at the end, I like the repetition and the message is great

Posted 8 Years Ago

that's really cool
simple as it is

Posted 8 Years Ago

wow it reminds me of my died as well :(

Posted 8 Years Ago

That's beautiful and really touching. He's definitely proud of you. Good job!

Posted 8 Years Ago

I thought this was a nice tribute to your father. Glad you have a good one.

Posted 8 Years Ago

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54 Reviews
Shelved in 3 Libraries
Added on July 12, 2012
Last Updated on July 16, 2012



Toronto, Mississauga, Canada



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