raining

today it is raining

i wonder how the weather can be so in sync with my emotions

because today it is raining and inside i am crying

i wonder if the storm clouds represent the dark fog within me

if the thundering corresponds with the thudding of my heart, if the water hitting the pavement splattering like my self esteem

i wonder

the rain reverts us back to our natural, unaffected state

removing makeup, causing our styled hair to go limp or frizzy

washed us of deceptions and reveals our vulnerability, cold and shivering, dripping wet

thats why i connect to it right now

my insides stripped of defenses and protection 

naked and bare, hurting and everyone can see

there is nowhere to turn 

so i'm standing in the freezing rain, clothes clinging to me uncomfortably and theres no shelter in sight

and each time we're in pain we think of it as the worst yet, the harshest blow we have ever received

so we often stand there in self pity asking over and over again "why me?"

passively experiencing whatever has befallen us, eventually just letting the rain pour down abandoning all attempts to search for shelter, no longer seeking relief from the storm raging inside of us, letting it consume us

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