Insanity

Insanity

A Poem by Ashleyx

 Wake me up, put me down

  Take me higher, show me out

Shake my chains, tear me apart

  Loosen my grip,

  Tighten your own

Detach and Disassemble

 abandon, rearrange

Bring her up, calm her down

  Stake the beast

She is, of course, wrong

Pull my hair, File my claws 

Cover my eyes, Bound my hands

Tighten the coat so that I may spill these thoughts

So that my mind can easily slide

For my mind is slipping, and I am a swing 

i dare you to dare me to stop

© 2010 Ashleyx


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I hope I am not reading this incorrectly, but it seems to me that this poem is being written using the voice of insanity...like insanity is saying here I am and challenging you to.stop it...like a little, albiet daunting voice.in your head. If this is the case than this poem really works for me. That is what insanity does...it slowly works against us, and reflects upon us what it is and what it is trying to do to us until we no longer have the ability to control it...and wins in the end when we truly become insane. I like the descriptions you use, and as a whole enjoyed the poem quite a bit. You did an exceptionally good job showing how insanity can slowly take hold upon on...and will do so patiently until it wins.

Posted 8 Years Ago


Interesting.

PROS: Smooth, and something about "filing my claws" gives me the mental image of the character, because of her insanity, being depitced as some kind of monster. I attribute part of this claw-filing to the fact that society deems weird or strange things as being "crazy" rather than just different. The claws make her the monster, the insane one. Filing the claws is society's way of taming the "insane" (or different) people through insane asylums or hoardes of prescription psychiatric medications.

CONS: Unless I'm mistaken, "Bound my hands" should be "bind (present tense) my hands" like the previous lines before.

Good stuff, keep up the "insane" work

Posted 9 Years Ago


interesting poem, a very good read. I look forward to reading more.

Posted 9 Years Ago


"Tighten the coat so that I may spill these thoughts
So that my mind can easily slide
For my mind is slipping, and I am a swing
i dare you to dare me to stop"

...i love how smoothly this reads!
...and definitely a chaotic/insane mood!!!
Nice---I Love It!!!

james:-)

Posted 9 Years Ago


Awesome creepy poem, I love it. :)

Posted 9 Years Ago


Now that's what I'm talkin' about! This is top quality, with a fantastic use and choice of words and phrases that depict the mental state powerfully. The whole rhyme runs up and down, back and forth, just like a child pushing high on a swing.
"Pull my hair, File my claws" -- great line...
And the last two are an excellent conclusion. Superb.

Posted 9 Years Ago


I know the feeling of this poem. Sometime best to be left alone to figure out what is the hell with us. So many strong lines. A outstanding poem. I like the ending. Thank you.
Coyote

Posted 9 Years Ago



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Added on May 2, 2010
Last Updated on May 2, 2010

Author

Ashleyx
Ashleyx

NJ



About
My name is Ashley, i am one of a kind, but really nothing special. I write, i dance, i live, i play. i love getting reviews, they make my life. So please if you wouldn't mind, please read something.. more..

Writing
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