Equilibrium

Expressing the tough balance of life

Dopamine rush,

Nicotine hit,

Thin vail of dullness,

Over Cloudy stale rain.

Exhausted from stimulus,

Exhausted of pain.

To rest, is to be restless.

Equilibrium is lost.

Does it exist?

Unwarranted, is to live but once.

Through pride and virtue, there is only strife.

Reviews

[Helen]

Used to be a 60 a day smoker and a pretty heavy drinker too. Have so much more balance now I've put them both down, although picking up a new habit like coffee drinking can tip the scale at times. I love any poems about smoking because I may not have smoked for 18 years and never will again, but a part of me will always be a smoker!! I once bought a book from a charity shop by JM Barrie [Peter Pan] called "My Lady Nicotine: A study in smoke". I don't remember it being as interesting as I hoped, but I couldn't resist the lure of even the word nicotine. I feel your poem describes the despair of addiction (to quote the book 'Alcoholics Anonymous' , the feeling of being "restless, irritable and discontent"). I smoked and drank (and misused food) in an attempt to medicate my emotional pain. In the end, equilibrium has come (on most days anyway) by sifting and sorting and processing that pain - much of which I did through poetry and writing! Thank you for a poem that connected me to my former self and made me think.

Oh look - here's a link to a pdf of My Lady Nicotine 😀. It looks more entertaining than I remember - I might give it another read.

https://www.gutenberg.org/files/18934/18934-h/18934-h.htm

Hope I didn't stray too far from your intended topic, but your poem created sparks for me!

[Capt_Kirk]

Thank you for your comment Helen. Im so happy to hear your overcoming as being a smoker. I do not consider myself a smoker, but I do have either a cigar and pipe with a glace of burbon or wine each Saturday night while I read and write my poetry. Even despite this slight indulgence, I still consider and challenge the purpose and virtue of being sober.

" I smoked and drank (and misused food) in an attempt to medicate my emotional pain. In the end, equilibrium has come (on most days anyway) by sifting and sorting and processing that pain - much of which I did through poetry and writing!" _ I am in my early twenties and am interested in achieving this holistic approach to dealing with this thing called life. Thank you for your time and consideration in your post.

[Helen]

I was an over-smoker, over-drinker, over-eater!! You sound like you do have balance. I wish you so very well on your holistic journey, impressed with your insight at a relatively young age. It took me a bit longer to see it (more like 40s for the start then 50s for the real healing), but every step of the way was mine and I had to take each one. I step lightly and with joy (most days) now. Thank you for sharing.

[barleygirl]

As a bipolar person, my extremes & addictions & self-medications have been legendary. My goal all along was just to bring all this s**t into balance. It doesn't work to strive for abstinence. The addictive personality needs SOME outlet to obsess on, even if it's seemingly good, such as religion or volunteering -- all obsessions can be abused. Anyhow, I love the way you pen your message in powerful imagery. This lets your message be open-ended, to include whatever one's fixation may be. Also I love that you've generated some great discussion in reviews! (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie

[Capt_Kirk]

Thank you, Barleygirl. I appreciate your willingness to not stray from what personality types need and rather redirect them. This approach seems much more natural. Balance is an interested analogy for me, mostly because it brings to mind being fixed at a given point. I try to embrace the ebbs and flows of live and have a ever changing and reactionary form of sustainability. As you can imagine, its a working process.... I appreciate your consideration greatly. :)

[barleygirl]

I enjoy your comparison between "balance" & "ebbs & flows" -- great point.

[John the Baptist]

Both stimulation and tranquilization have their limits. One can bring destruction, the other, boredom. Equilibrium is finding the balance between the two. Not always easy, but worth the effort.

[Capt_Kirk]

Your right John, it is not always easy and is always worth the effort. I am in my early twenties and I feel as though my generation has been lead down a road of constant stimulation, that when gone unregulated, can be the most powerful source of our fulfillment. A fulfillment that is hollow and without substance.

[John the Baptist]

If you are alert and wise, the years will add balance. I know. I've been there.

[Capt_Kirk]

Thank you, John. I trust in your advice.