Disenchanted

(reflecting on a once revered place and memory)

shadows fall upon meadow grass

where once from atop a hill

sol burned on rolled bales of hay

.

august baked in noon blaze heat

replete with happiness was i, from

top knot hair to bare soles of feet

.

golden moments to remember

when black crows in random rows

became musical notes of song

.

how this valley sang of summer

from gentle slopes sweeping down

to where death's stain now lingers

.

fingers will forever point to where

a blade in winter flashed cold steel

plunged in anger into tender flesh

.

perpetrators all three doomed

young lives brewing in ruin and one

adolescent mourned in disbelief

.

      grief pervades our valley

Reviews

[Neville]

certain things, whether they are beautiful and golden, or conversely, dreadful and dark tend to get lodged in our memory banks .. not everyone is able to recall them at will .. poets even when they may have languished over a particular word or aspect of their emerging work tend to have that special gift .. and here, I both sense and fear is an excellent example of such a recovery and subsequent sharing of fine art .. Neville

[Chris Shaw]

Thank you Neville. I can not yet walk there as I will have to pass the spot where a 14 year old died, ten minutes after saying goodbye to his mum. He's gone to pastures new and the other three are incarcerated and will be for sometime. However, I will go there again and I'm waiting for the end of August to see the hay bales and the crows.

Chris

[Neville]

blimey .. no bloomin wonder .. I guessed something like that may have inspired these words Chris

[Lisasview]

Death and nature seem to go hand in hand so using nature as a metaphor is so wonderful.
Yes life can be cruel..but it is up to us to find the opening to happiness.
Once again I really liked your in-depth poem Chris.
Have a lovely day,
Lisa

[Chris Shaw]

Thank you Lisa. Hope all is good with you. So appreciate you stopping by.to read my efforts.

Chris

[jennifer little]

interesting poem great write keep up the good work

[Chris Shaw]

Thank you Jennifer. All the best.

Chris

[Patricia]

I have been moving backwards in your poetry and for over week I only had access to like the last five or so. So forgive me for not returning favors for you. I’m not sure what happened but your list is back and now I have to find where I left off, not an easy task when you have pages of reviews so I may be reviewing more than once as I go along but I will try not to. As for this piece it is such an emotionally driven and strong piece of writing from you but such is life and death and it inspires us and it must be written. You do it with such grace that even the harshest of life is given beauty.

[Chris Shaw]

Aw, you sweetheart. You are so appreciated. Thanks for the encouragement ((Patricia)).

read moreAw, you sweetheart. You are so appreciated. Thanks for the encouragement ((Patricia)).

Chris

[M. J. Smith]

Tears burn on my cheeks. Anger Sears my heart. How can such cruelty exist? Is there still hope, Chris?

[Chris Shaw]

Thank you MJS. Yes we live in a cruel world. Good to see you.

Chris

[Ada]

Nice use of nature as metaphor to talk about death. Separation is never easy and your reader is reminded of that in this piece.

[Chris Shaw]

Many thanks Ada, pleased you enjoyed the read. All the best.

Chris

[JE Falcon]

A very powerful write, here. And to our dismay, words spoken in sadness, about violence, is always a powerful voice. If not surrounded by it, then the evening news will make us well aware that we live in a dangerous world. --- None the less, poems like yours might tell us that there may be a better way.

[Chris Shaw]

Thank you so much Falcon for your visit and thoughts. This week it was the first anniversary of the death of Ollie. The other three young people have been sentenced. I can no longer walk in this place. It has lost its beauty.

Chris

[Lathen Griffiths]

I was rambling across fields for a while here soaking up the late summer sun and then WHAM!

Totally unexpected, just as violence is very often. Very compelling.

[Chris Shaw]

Yes, where I rambled in delight, I no longer go. This beautiful place is a stain now on my memory. Violence gets everywhere. Thank you Lathe.

Chris

[shadrach hah]

Hi Chris, another strong, powerful write from your pen. What a world we live in today. Death can come from anywhere. Our young are being brainwashed by hate. Such a raw, strong write. We are disenchanted by these times. Another thought-provoking write from your pen. What is life coming to? Hugs always....Mike.

[Chris Shaw]

Thank you Mike. I am saddened by the violence that prevails today. I did not know this in my younger years. I felt safe then. These days, no one feels safe. Such hatred around. Appreciate you reading.

[shadrach hah]

You are welcome, Chris, you are right, so much hatred around. I wish things were as they were when I was young. Have a wonderful Sunday. Hugs always....Mike.

[Cherrie Palmer]

It is a hard thing when joy and tragedy crowd in the same space.
You did an excellent job expressing this.

[Chris Shaw]

Thank you Cherrie. Pleased you checked in. You are appreciated.

Chris