You make poison taste like wine�

You make poison taste like wine�

A Poem by An owl on the moon
"

Oh, those toxic relationships!

"

 

 

You make poison taste like wine;

Make dying a breathtaking time.

 

Suffocating beauty draped in white

Drowning in your childlike light.

 

Feed me cakes with sugared shards;

Bury me alive in your crimson yard.

 

Your toxic skin is soft and warm;

In burning screams I fall deformed.

 

Stab me, shoot me; I don’t care…

I need your touch, your taste, your stare.

 

You make poison taste like wine...

© 2009 An owl on the moon


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Ouch! The title is captivating, color and choice of font makes this write even more inviting to read. I was truly drawn into this :
"Feed me cakes with sugared shards;
Bury me alive in your crimson yard." ~ Wonderful lines. This poems speaks of bittersweet love and fatal attraction to the extreme. Nice work.

Posted 13 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

Toxic love personified. Hope she's long gone!

Posted 10 Years Ago


Wow this is a bit different than your latest! But every good none the less! Of course they have to be like read wine... blush isn't dry enough! "Bury me in your crimson yard" That line is hardcore!

Posted 12 Years Ago


LOL that is fun Like this as the most intriguing

Feed me cakes with sugared shards;
Bury me alive in your crimson yard.

Posted 12 Years Ago


Oh where would I be without my toxic relationships...
Probably not on this site. That is why this despite the content made me smirk. You have such a powerful way with words when you want to. Just like a smack to the face this was awaking.

Posted 12 Years Ago


Oh what have we here.. the flow of seduction by temptation from that of a toxic lover? Such reality is sooo known by many.. those desires that burn in most every soul.. hard to fight it!!! Your ex-lover I presume.. has a way of making you forget yourself most likely in their passionate behaviours.. it's that bad attraction to the wrong types of people that many do struggle with too.... LUST is the key element behind this writing.. we all have those lustful moments! She has such a way about her that attracts you to her.. her behaviour would be uninhibited as her morals or standards are not that of someone with higher standards. Her childlike qualities is a yearning to feel young and carefree.. her touch and taste are planted in you .. interesting write... one that many will relate to in these times! Thank you for sharing!!! =)

Posted 12 Years Ago


I love the urgency and crazed passion to take anything you can from this person but you still do it poetically and romantically. Great, great write!

Posted 12 Years Ago


feed me cakes with sugared shards. I have to say this line is standout for me - the juxtaposition of sharp and sweet, very nice. I almost feel the poem doesn't need
"Stab me, shoot me; I don't care�

I need your touch, your taste, your stare." as the rest of the poem makes this part clear. Nicely done.



Posted 12 Years Ago


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AG
gotta say, mixed reviews.

this was definitely an enjoyable read, no doubt about that. their is a both a pleasant mixture of neo-Gothic and Romantic tones in your poem which I very much liked. it was a very cunning concept.

the only thing i find off with this poem is that,while the imagery is superb, the core concepts seem to be much overused in a way that this does not appear much to me as a distinctive piece. don't get me wrong though, this IS very stunning material. but i feel that the awe i feel now may be temporary as it doesn't quite present new things to the table.

this was still a wonderful piece and i shall include it in my Finalists' list

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Your toxic skin is soft and warm;

In burning screams I fall deformed. amazing lines..
Your style is unique..like your words
You have a mind that can makes travel
into your fantasy and mind..Love it

Posted 12 Years Ago



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Added on November 14, 2008
Last Updated on February 22, 2009

Author

An owl on the moon
An owl on the moon

About
2018 was a journey through my poetic novel, An Owl on the Moon. 2019 found me goinging back to a deep inspiration for me... Wonderland...2020 will whisper itself over the seasons... Come walk the worl.. more..

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