Venom and spite

Somebody I knew

                    You spiteful b***h

                How dare you judge her

 

                  That jealous smile

              Those words that fester

 

                  Spreading slander

             always worth your time

 

                  Lying hypocrite

               Ooooh so out of line

 

                     Accusations

            On your weasel's tongue

 

             Passing judgments

                over everyone

 

               Casting glances

            With accusing eyes

 

              I know the truth

               All you do is lie

 

           You wretched shrew

           All you cause is pain

 

            You cynical witch

          Poison's in your viens

 

           Think you're clever?

           You pathetic fool

 

          You think it's funny

          Funny to be cruel.

 

 

Reviews

[That_Girl]

Harsh but brilliant. Someone obviously needed to be put in her place. XD

[Baby Ricochet]

Someone I knew years ago. Lived to stir up trouble.

[That_Girl]

Sounds familiar... :)

[Shimmerbliss/CAF]

It is obvious that she really was a wicked one. It amazes me that you can keep such flow going even when you write in the heat of outrage. Well done, and wouldn't you have liked to say it to her...maybe you did, but here it is "on paper" and "documented"

"your weasel's tongue" love that expression!

[Baby Ricochet]

Oh we exchanged words. THanx

[A love for poetry]

Awesome! I had a flatmate like that, God; she was nasty and spiteful!

You cynical witch
Poison's in your viens

Good rhythm!

[Baby Ricochet]

thanx

[ewest1220]

I love the just pure, raw fury that comes from this piece! Great job!

[Baby Ricochet]

thanx

[Annabelle Lee]

Wow! make someone cower in fear withOUT having to raise a fist, wish i had your silver tongue and sharp wit

[Baby Ricochet]

thanx

[Persephone]

Oh this is filled to the brim with emotion. This is one of those poems after you write it, you feel so much better. I love the shape of it and how it kind of leans. I relate to it and think it is very good. Awesome job!

[Baby Ricochet]

thanx

[Heather Maria]

It was intersting. Sorry, but I don't know much about poetry technique to give you any advice on those lines. This one isn't my favorite of yours, because it just didn't do anything for me. That isn't your fault because we all connect with different things. The one thing I always see in your poetry is how real it is. I don't have to search for the meaning of the stanza or the metaphor.

[Baby Ricochet]

that's ok i I don't know anything about poetry technique either.

[Shelley Holt-Lowrey]

Venom in, venom out. It is all so ugly. This is a true to life depiction of what the end looks like often, but I find it so sad. How we can love so deeply and then turn on a dime with an equal intensity and embrace a hate such as this? It does not seem right, but it is and part of being human. I like the poetry. The subject matter - moved emotion. That is the point after all yes?

[Baby Ricochet]

It was about someone I knew who lived to cause trouble and she purposely said cruel things to hurt the girl I was with at the time. What you got from the piece is a different perspective I'd not thought of and I appreciate that. That's one of the things I love about reviews. You can look at your work from through someone else's eyes. Thank you

[Shelley Holt-Lowrey]

Thank you for that. Nice to hear it was helpful to you. I too often forget that people come at our work with their own experience and perspective. It is curious about how writing can be interpreted. I have a whole rant on symbolism in writing. I think it is either employed only for literati or, like this, accidental - but then literati say it is intentional. Interesting commentary on this!

[Pax]

a rant on a poem style is always clever. good job.

[Baby Ricochet]

thanx

[TrinityHawk]

I like the way this reads, and seems to go back and forth like a tug a war. You can hear the seething anger in your "voice" ... someone made you mad *smile*

[Baby Ricochet]

yeah she did. Thanx