Facade

Will you traverse with me across my world

Shelter me inside your arms

Succumb to my constant, urgent wants

Please the fickle child in me

Calm the thunderous roars around

Cover the earth in pristine peace

Level the ground so I don't trip and fall

Bring to a smile to my countenance

Gather gems so sparse and rare

That twinkle more than stars ever could

And present to me what I covet

Or is your façade truly a lie, as I can see are your woven tales of loyalty

Will you stand to you words or stand by me, together

Not a servant bowing to my feet

For your beliefs of what I am are different than what they should be

You couldn't possibly understand the inner workings of my mind

If your eyes cannot see through my own

Into an elaborate soul caught in the midst of infinite confusion

Fighting silently through day and night

Working towards a greater goal than possibly imaginable

Having told none about such dreams of….

Yet that is what secrets are

And an admiring twat is unwanted

However, should you still feel the need to walk in my tracks

Trace my image through your mind

And bestow upon me material possessions

Which I would rather you bestow upon someone far more worthy or needy of such

Then I applaud your futile tenacity

And will make note to leave you with something to dwell on

Than the façade I played before you for all these years

When I leave this place and your line of sight forever more  

Reviews

[Zeitgeist Manifesto]

For some strange reason..parts of this poem came to me as portraits of Cleopatra and Salome. It brings to mind, many Femme Fatales in history who have shaped powerful men to their liking. There is darkness in the words, but the cold and calculating mind of this person disturbs me the most. You've created a piece of work that leaves an impression. The lack of empathy and sense of entitlement are unbelievable. Not only have you created a startling character here, but you have created a spirit that took on a life of it's own. This is Deep.

[Kenny L. Mitchell]

Zang girl! Where have YOU been? I swear evertime I come to this site I find something breathtaking and beautiful. I FEEL your words you rock!

Kenny!

[Dennis Shanaberg]

Having told none about such dreams of….
Yet that is what secrets are
And an admiring twat is unwanted

These three lines are probably some of the best I've ever read. The first two because the way they flow together with the common idea of the secrets, and the second because I've never seen that term used so artfully.
There's a type of humour to all your writings, not necessarily good (happy) humour, but a sense that you can still see the lights at the end of the tunnel.
I also loved the shift in tone after the line: Or is your facade truly a lie...
It was a very intense and emotional shift that really showed the range of emotions of the speaker in the poem. My only criticism is that you lose a bit of the flow of the poem after the shift, but who knows, maybe that's what you were going for.
And excellent piece. Keep at it.

[ZmH]

i really like this piece ur a vry good writer keep up the good work