who's the barest of them all?

who's the barest of them all?

 

 

you dipped yourself in flatter batter

then consumed your own ego

with a dash of flutter butter

lashes winging their way to stardom

only your eyes saw bigger than your heart

and you left me at the start

putting the leftovers in a freezer

as cold as you,

till as old as you

need to be

to ultimately see

 

at what cost you lost your flavor

and fallen out of favor

with the mirror

of your conscience.

 

 

 

 

 

erin-cilberto

8/6/15

Reviews

[Alfred Kukitz]

I knew when I saw the title that I dandy was coming forth. And like a rocket ship heading to the planet conscience we touch down. Jacob has landed and its a beauty!

regards,
al

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind words, and clever reply, Al.

j.

[Lydia Shutter]

Absolutely LOVE the title...a great play on the line from Snow White! "Flatter batter"....now THAT is unique and so very descriptive. Too many believe what their inflated egos tell them. Then they go on celebrity fantasy trips. Unfortunately, they often leave behind those who truly care for them. Somepeople do not understand those who love them do so for what is inside more than what is reflected in the mirror. This one rocks, Jacob! Lydi**

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your really kind review, Lydi...

j.

[Adam Adams]

Very fascinating write for sure! I guess, you treasure someone's pure beauty with full devotions that makes readers enjoying reading your work with excitement & interests. Great job!

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your words, Adams.
j.

[....................]

there's no fairest in this mirror, just the eventual reality that one day beauty fades and the true colours of her conscience will fade; that her popularity will wane...love the line 'eyes saw bigger than your heart' - some people want it all and then some when all along it destroys them...great write

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind review, FT.

j.

[jeannemarie coulter]

intriguing write...caught me and threw questions to stir my thoughts...heavy connection for me in the quoted lines...well done, sir...

only your eyes saw bigger than your heart
and you left me at the start
putting the leftovers in a freezer

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you, jeannemarie,

j.