in the wrong sky

in the wrong sky

 

 

metaphor me

quietly

I want to hear the birds

sing my song

 

as their feathers 

brush against the poem

that makes my fingers

rush to the nest of keys

in my mind

 

I wrote something once

and it made sense

but then it flew from intent

and the tiny syllables split open

with newborn words

 

pecking at my animosity

I want to love her

but she is a vulture's tune

off key

 

the mountains hide her ridicule

but only for a brief flight

 

and then I see her for what she is

and plead to be metaphored 

quietly

so I can sleep her off

and fly away from the sibling blues

that ground me.

 

 

erin-cilberto

7/3/2021

Reviews

[Benita-Staebell M - Kin..]

Wonderful stanza
and lines it has
a sad gloomy
melancholy
Feel to it nicely
written.

pecking at my animosity
I want to love her
but she is a vulture's tune
off key

the mountains hide her ridicule
but only for a brief flight

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Thank you for your kind review, Benita,
j.

[Cassie]

hahaha..the last stanza gets me reeling with laughter, Jacob you are soo good

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you, Cassie...I appreciate you.

[Patricia Wedel]

A feathery melancholy Blues with
symbolic symphonies... a one night stand...
on Demand... gently, Pat

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind words, Pat,
j.

[Julie McCarthy (juliesp..]

Absolutely in love with these bird metaphors
So clever love it Jacob I chirped

[jacob erin-cilberto]

i think i heard your chirp, Julie...thank you,
j.

[Fran Marie]

an intense piece of
deep emotions spring
forth, laden with a heavy
sadness of a lost love
sometimes so hard to
forget and carry on
very well expressed
..

[jacob erin-cilberto]

I appreciate your words, Fran Marie,
j.

[Chris Shaw]

Sadness here. Being in the wrong sky, is painful.

pecking at my animosity
I want to love her
but she is a vulture's tune
off key

sibling blues, never suffered that plight Jacob and I have four of them.

All I can say is, I wish you peace from thoughts that cause you pain and remind you of what you haven't got. Heart ache of a poem.

Chris

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind words, Chris,
j.

[Cheyenne Lee]

This is beautifully melancholic. The flow, the message, just everything about it is so well done. Thank you for sharing this!

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kindness, Cheyenne,
j.

[adornoscousin]

There is a sadness in this. Perhaps all love is sad because it ends or can end. I am reminded of Buddhism and how all life suffering because we cling.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

interesting...we do cling, for sure.
thank you, adorno,
j.

[adornoscousin]

I also just noticed the title and LOVE it. That opens up some many interpretations as well. Such a great title and I which I thought of it.

[The Rock And Roll Cowbo..]

Another greatt poem. A metaphoricsl gem. I think of ehen We lose a love and move on then think of how you told her you can't live without her and now you can't think of why.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your words, Cowboy.
j.