I Just Want to Go Home

I Just Want to Go Home

A Poem by Floornine
"

I've seen to the end... and in the end, all I want is the beginning.

"

I have fifteen fingers
And twenty two toes.
I walk on a sideways
And paint my nails red
To kill and to dare,
For I am the monster of
All that I haven't done.

 

But I've seen to the end.

 

I have an anonymous lover
And an unknown mistress
They fight and I watch.
The fists fly
Set free and set fire.
They come out like bruised fruit.
Damaged goods.

 

But I've seen to the end of the end.

 

I have 17 children
And a broken womb.
So I dance with strangers.
They don't have names
And they don't have faces.
They breathe on my neck
And I leave my number
On the bathroom wall.

 

But I've seen to the end of the end of the end.

 

I have a house
With an upstairs and a downstairs.
It looks big from the outside.
It looks warm and quiet
From the outside.
My car stalls in the driveway.
I just want to go home.

© 2009 Floornine


Author's Note

Floornine
This is my emotional outpouring... no revisions... I just had to get it down.

My Review

Would you like to review this Poem?
Login | Register




Reviews

In the oddest why I can really identify with this one. The feeling I get from it anyway is that you often feel out of place or misplaced as though somewhere out there is a home for you but you've never seen it or you barely have a memory of it. All of these things are going on, good and bad, just basically a cluster of mixed situations all surrounding you all of the time and there you are, standing there, or sitting there, and you just want to be home, having never been to such a place before...

Posted 11 Years Ago


Has a hint of postmodernism in its descriptions of its environment, as well as the existentialist outpouring of the persona. Truly wonderful images wandered my mind as I read this poem. Clever. You have such strong emotions in this poem. Try controlling them and great things might happen.

Twas a good read.

Punishment

Posted 12 Years Ago


very different...cannot say that i could relate to it...!! BUT I LOVED IT...venting it out creatively....raw emotions ! AND PASSIONATE AND YES INTENSE TOO...

Posted 12 Years Ago


This was very raw and real. Things we see, things percieved and the actual reality of our lives. Great write. Thanks for sharing it.

Posted 12 Years Ago


I like it. 1st stanza: Line 3: 'I walk sideways' perhaps? Line 6: get rid of 'For' ?
3rd stanza: Line 3: get rid of 'So'? Line 7: same for 'And'?
4th stanza: i reckon 'it looks quiet and warm from the inside' would be much more suggestive.

Sorry, i'm an editor by trade... it's habit!
But i like it!


Posted 12 Years Ago


I really like this poem. The fact that the repeating line keeps growing each time sort of gives a feeling of how as one goes through life the list of things they'd never have believed they'd do, (or wouldn't do) and the things they absolutely have to do just keeps growing and growing. The need to just start over feels more imperative as the poem goes on. And gosh, the narrator is so exhausted; that's life in it's rawest form.

That's my interpretation, anyhow. Very nice job.

Posted 12 Years Ago


Another good one- raw with stong emotion. I like it how it is without revisions... has a "real" sound to it and a connected feeling- there's a certain vulnerability and honesty when a an Author writes from the heart and doesn't over-edit. Oh- love the beginning... Very nice first few lines!

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

It's an interesting poem!

Posted 12 Years Ago


0 of 1 people found this review constructive.

I'm glad you got it down. I really love that repetitious line. Brings the whole piece together.

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


Request Read Request
Add to Library My Library
Subscribe Subscribe


Stats

306 Views
9 Reviews
Rating
Added on January 8, 2009
Last Updated on January 22, 2009

Author

Floornine
Floornine

About
I like awkward things and people, lomography, and tea. If I like you, I'll tell you. People think it's cute. I'm just clumbsy with all that lingual foreplay. If you ask me to be your friend, I .. more..

Writing

Related Writing

People who liked this story also liked..