her words were like
tiny razor blades
cutting my flesh
with the precision
of a doctor
When a woman goes too far, the ache that is caused is felt by more than just her victim. She will realize, one day, her mistake. This was a beautiful piece full of the misery and uncompromising nastiness that I have found in some people.
Our society is essentially selfish today, and one of the many downfalls is that we believe everything must be our way or not at all... Love is so rare to find that it broke my heart that religion, something meant to bring people together, broke it up.... THis was lovely in a heartbreaking way... My only suggestion is that when you mention the verse in 2 Corinthians, actually add it into the poem. Not everyone is well read enough to know what your talking about and I found it as a sort of distraction throughout the poem. I kept wondering "well...what does that verse actually say?" so consider adding it in. Otherwise.......great work.
The great religions of the world all hold a piece of truth in them. There are no perfect books, perfect religions or perfect people. But God is perfect and true. If I said I was acting on John Smith's words then torched your house, you might be angry with me but chances are you would not like John Smith much either. God has been misrepresented by the flesh for the simple reason that the flesh is imperfect. That is why you never see people acting out God as a charade, its just too impossible. If, by the same token, I were to build you a new home free of charge and told you it was John Smith's idea, you might think John Smith was a pretty nice dude to be giving away houses to strangers. John simply said that,"God is love." I can believe that when the words stop making sense. An intelligent and well written piece.
I find a nice narrative quality in your poems, they tell wonderful and interesting stories. I would also love (only a personal opinion) to read them in an abridged form, shorter, more concise, I feel that they would be even more powerful then.
her words were like
tiny razor blades
cutting my flesh
with the precision
of a doctor
When a woman goes too far, the ache that is caused is felt by more than just her victim. She will realize, one day, her mistake. This was a beautiful piece full of the misery and uncompromising nastiness that I have found in some people.
Wow, powerful indeed, and a conflict that I haven't been awakened to at all. Faith V. Love, a tragic ending but such a unique tale. It read as if it was a poetic short story, and I enojoyed it very much!
OMG that is sooooo sad sweetie. I would never want to compromise my beliefs for love but I bet if Stickz asked me to I would. I was Christian when she and I met and though she never asked, I took up Wicca for her and myself as well so if she were to ask me I might give it all up to keep her. This is beautiful no matter how sad.
This line has been crossed for many people, many wonder what to do when this happends.
I think you wrote it perfect and I think many would have chose the same path as you did.
Great write!! Thanks for sharing.
Kelley Frost
The quiet submissive who adores to worship woman through lifestyle, poetry and stories. I have been writing for many years. At first I wrote alot of political poetry exploring my understanding of go.. more..