My Wish

My love,
I wanna see
your smiling face.
I wanna hear
your sound of laughing.
And
I want to see
your convenience.
I do not wish to stay
beside you.
My only wish is
To fulfill your needs.

Reviews

[Molafvt]

I am not sure I fully understand your intention here. i don't understand what you mean by "I want to see your convenience" and if you only want "To fulfill" his needs and "do not wish to stay beside" him, then how can this be love?. Just a question Cherry. I'm always interested in the Artists intent. I also find it somewhat unbelievable that anyone can be so selfless. This IS a provocative piece, I'll say that much. Possibly this more about the love of "friendship" rather than a passionate love? Either way, you got me reeling.

[Snapdragon]

It's better to give of yourself and strive to make them happy. Lovely job.

[Quaddeth]

I enjoyed the staggered form, it spoke a lot in its own right. I felt this poem is a justification of the phrase "Less is more" which I whole-heartedly agree with. Great job.

[Coyote Poetry]

A wise person should concern them self with their pardner pleasure. That is when true pleasure is possible. I like this poem. Sweet and delicate words telling a very good story. A outstanding poem.
Coyote

[Faceless Love]

simple, beautiful, and short. Good job !

[J.S. Pua]

a simple tender write..
good.

[Jibey]

A nice feel to this somehow... and an intriguing phrase. 'I want to see your convenience'...

There is a tenderness about the soft gentle wish