Depression

A poem I privately wrote at the lowest point in my life, under the influence of taking drugs and drinking daily.

I had reservations about posting this but I feel like it is a good representation of my mind at that time.

Depression

My lives a damn game of f*****g monopoly,

I guess I’m rolling low, like I ought to be,

Everybody’s f*****g with me it ain’t monogamy.

Look at my life,

I’m 19 years old, Battling

Depression,

Addiction,

And paranormal afflictions,

I don’t know when this s**t will end.

With a gun or a knife or a hypodermic needle full of heroin,

Might as well pop one or two handfuls of f*****g xenadrine,

But right now; my psyche is preoccupied with the

Predisposition and self-obsession of my mind, raping myself.

And aside from that I still grew up,

I’m now,

Older

Bolder

Colder

With the f*****g soul of a soldier

Grandma taught me to elevate,

Above every level of hate,

Cuz that’s the quickest way for me to get to heavens gate,

But I feel like.

I’m going through changes, the world miss-arranges,

I’m stuck with the rages, and it burns on for ages,

I’m flipping through pages; of the newspapers,

And none of them gauges, 

that the world Is in the dark ages.

Author's Note

I left grammatical errors in as to not remove from the authenticity.