One day

Love defies all

You tell me you know
I say you don't

You tell me you understand
I say you can't

You tell me you care
--I say you shouldn't say that
At least... not the way I do

One day you will
-But it won't be for me...

One day, you will meet a guy so special to you,
The world will be magical while he's around,
He will be that special someone that-
While you know isn't perfect,
He will be to you
--Then you will start to understand

He will make the world alright for you
--The way you did for me.
When he is around,
your only thoughts will be of him
And when he is gone
--They will still be of him.

So I pray that he feels the same way about you
I don't want you to fight the feelings
Just as I have to fight mine
I don't want you to go through the agonizing pain of a love
--That you shouldn't have.
Feelings
--You aren't allowed to feel...

But no matter what happens,
It will all be worth it
--Because he will be worth it

He will tell you how magically beautiful you are,
How your smile lights his world
And your laugh
--That wonderful laugh
Feels perfect

You won't believe him.
But you won't care whether it's true or not
Simply...
--Because he said them about you

You may fight these feelings,
Not willing to let your walls fall.
But one day the fighting will stop, the walls still come down--
And you will know in your heart,
That you love him
I know,
--Because it happened to me.

So you tell me you know
I say you shouldn't

You tell me you understand
I say you will

You tell me you love me...
Well,
--You used to tell me that anyway

Author's Note

They say everything happens for a reason, I'm still looking for mine

Reviews

[Corset]

(we'll just keep telling ourselves that darlin') Another wonderfully honest and beautifully moving write...hits home and hurts perfectly in all the right ways

[Darian B.]

"Hurts perfectly in all the right ways" I love this as it really is how I feel about my feelings for the girl I write about. She is worth every bit of pain I have felt over my situation and I wouldn't trade meeting her for the world. Thank you Corset

[William Liston]

Good poem, and I could relate to it all too well. As for the girl I like...I want her to be happy, even if it's not with me. I think you did very well with describing your emotions in this piece. The parallel structure between the beginning and ending stanzas was very nice; it really stressed the significance of your thoughts.

If I may crituque, I must say that one of my pet peeves is the use of the word "thing(s)." In some cases, there's nothing wrong with it, but in other cases, it can hinder the use of description to enhance the point.

Let's take this stanza for example:

He will tell you things you don't fully believe
But you won't care as to the truth
Simply...
--Because he said them about you

Let's see what happens when we take out the word 'things' and add some description:

So when he tells you
how sweet you are...
or when he tells you
how beautiful your eyes are
--even when they're filled with tears...
You'll believe it...
simply because He said it.

The latter stanza has more strength in my opinion. It also shows why you love her the way you do...but that's just my opinion. I still think this is a really good poem.

-William Liston

[Darian B.]

I know what you mean, I want her to be happy no matter what happens to me. I will try to revise the stanza that uses things but I just need to make it my own. My biggest thing is my sincerity so I have to describe it exactly the way I mean it. Thank you again William

[William Liston]

Oh yes...I wanted you to make it your own.

[William Liston]

I like the change you made.

[Ananya]

It reads so sad. Yet the love shines through them. A love that is sad but not bitter. It made me cry. I don't know if it's about you or just imagination. But you have written it exceptionally well.

[Darian B.]

Thank you very much. It is from my real perspective, but it is addressed to the girl that i care deeply for. You describe the way I love her perfectly though. I could never blame her for not loving me back, it just saddens me. Thank you for the kind words, they mean a lot

[Tessa Melendez]

So sad... So very sad... It will always amaze me how you manage to weave such deep sadness into your pieces. You always find that way to organize your stanzas, put those lines and spaces between words to make the pieces seem so very sad and have the reader nearly in tears. If not fully in tears. I pray you find your happiness friend....

[Darian B.]

Thank you Tessa, it means a lot to hear that people actually feel when they read my poetry, if not then I am just throwing my voice out there for deaf ears. I will find happiness one day, but I don't want it until she finds hers.

[Tessa Melendez]

You shouldn't wait for someone to find their happiness in order for you to find yours. Take yours when it comes.

[Darian B.]

I don't think I can be happy knowing she isn't and I wouldn't want to be, I love her too deeply and care for her too much. I would give my life for her to be happy because she is that important to me

[Tessa Melendez]

Awwww!! :'( I understand...

[Desirée Tolliver]

This is a very intriguing poem. This poem is so beautiful and full of deep emotion. I really enjoyed reading it from start to finish. I would like to commend you on your creativity. Keep up the good work and good luck on your future endeavors. I look forward to reading more writing by you in the future.

[Darian B.]

Thank you. I really don't know that I'm very creative though, I just let my emotions flow but I appreciate the complement. :)

[Desirée Tolliver]

You're Welcome :)! Besides, poems written with the flow of emotion are usually the best ones anyway so keep writing. I believe WritersCafe will see great things from you ;)