Between dusk and Dawn

from 2010

 Between the hours of dusk and dawn

beyond the boundaries of time

he plays upon my quiet yawn

and paints my dreams sublime

***

he does not stay til mornings light

as all good dreams when thus awake

but comes to me 'most every night

and begs of me this chance to take

***

he bids me follow I know not where

though I try to turn away

I can't forget his haunting stare

so I am therefore led astray

***

between the dreams and wishes cast

complacent though it seems to be

I cannot see beyond his mask

so ponder his validity

***

although I know he is not real

I cannot wait to dream again

when my heart and mind he'll steal

dreams & reality somehow transcend

 

©  2010 bj smith

aka shallimarRose

Author's Note

Feel free to comment/critique... Thanks for reading.. shallimarRose

Reviews

[AnnaLeQuinn]

So amazing!! Loved the mystery you make him seem. So unattainable in your reality but a lure to sleep and dream. This can be so true at times. The excitement of shutting your eyes for joy of what you may get to experience on the other side of conscienceless. Amazing write. Loved it.
Anna

[shallimarRose]

Thank you for reading again Anna and for the great review.. xo shallimarRose

[Girl Friday (Sarah W.)]

Excellent use of imagery and vivid word choice. I love the blending of the real and the surreal; dreams vs. reality and how they converge at times.

between the dreams and wishes cast
complacent though it seems to be
I cannot see beyond his mask
so ponder his vitality

My favorite stanza...just speaks so honestly and emotionally. Well done.

[shallimarRose]

Thank you Sarah .. the word is validity thought not vitality.. A whole different box of worms there lol.. Im glad you enjoyed this one.. huggs, shallimar

[Trevor Jay Bloodworth]

This is really good Shallimar. Well done. I loved reading every word.

[shallimarRose]

Thank you Trevor.. Always happy to see you have read my work.. xo shallimarRose

[Stella Armour]

in our dreams we can be anyone we like, but to meet a fantasy lover is very special...dream away my friend....

[shallimarRose]

Thank you Stella.. I write a lot about dreams.. some good and some bad.. Not usually real dreams but rather just my ink taking over.. lol I appreciate your taking time to read and comment.. shallimarRose

[David Scott]

Ah... I wonder if we all have a lover we know only in our dreams... So real and so palpable in the realm of disquieted slumbers, yet unreachable in when the mind is crowded with the harshness of our overriding senses insistence on claiming us to the reality of the state we believe is more conscious... I do wonder at times. Only , "Between dusk and Dawn" however. ;)
Great poetry Rose.

[shallimarRose]

Thank you David for reading and for taking time to comment.. shallimarRose

[ShelleyA]

A good write about your dream lover. Heartfelt and introspective. Good imagery and descriptives. Flow is good as is the line to line transition and breaks. Nice rhythm and enjambment. Rhyme is good as is the rhyme scheme. A mix of near perfect dactylic and masculine end line rhyme that is executed very well in this piece. Lovely depth of feeling. Whimsical. Good word choice. Good closing lines. Well penned. Write on!

[Rita L. Sev]

Beautiful flow to this piece, dreamlike itself... Dream lovers never disappoint! :) Excellent write!

[shallimarRose]

Thanks Rita.. Its actually about dreaming but also about online men (and women) "I cannot see beyond his mask so ponder his validity." We only know the avatar and what they put out here.. I suspect a great deal are not what they seem... Thanks for reading.. xo shallimar
so ponder his validity"

[Coyote Poetry]

A beautiful poem for dreams. Good dreams are good to find again. Allow us to awake with hope and positive energy. I like the description of the dream and the very good ending. Thank you for the excellent poetry.
Coyote

[shallimarRose]

Thank you Coyote... I appreciate your reading as always.. xo shallimar

[Sharon L.H. Kelly]

You have penned the beauty of anticipating a lovely dream. Where would we be without them?

[shallimarRose]

Thank you for taking time to read Sharon.. xo shallimar

[ba_mcfarlane]

great read great write great smile

[shallimarRose]

Thank you so much.. and thank you for taking the time to read.. xo shallimarRose