A promise!!

 

 

 

Even as twilight draws closer,

the stars give way to dawn,

clouds hover over the sky,

rain washes the dirt away,

the seasons may march on,

the years pass on,

My eyes may grow Weak,

leave my heart all alone,

I wont care for the world,

Waiting day in and day out,

dreaming of your warmth,

never leaving my place,

Hit me with a stick,

Hit me by saying he wont return,

I will be waiting till I breathe my last,

'cause I promised you my love....

 

 

Reviews

[Tapsi]

i love it...:)
its a prose poem??? well written and greatly expressed :)

[Gary McDonald]

What a gentle poem, full of such tender emotion. It speaks so honestly of the true love that lures us all, and the promises bound to such devotion. Great write!

[Sean M. Addams]

i like the whole concept of this piece... overall i thought this piece was simply wonderful..nice job!!

[Nayan]

Oh dear! How sweat can Love be!!! Your poem is beautiful in its meaning and very lovely!

[Shalini Dinesh (Poet's ..]

a very magnificent picture,
short and crisp poem as shreya said...
strong emotions and a life long promise!
when you taste true love, you can never come out of it, either you have promised or not...

[Shreya]

this one's crisp n cute. Did smthing inspire you?

[Coyote Poetry]

A beautiful poem of love and desire. When love touches our heart it become a permanent tattoo on our heart. A excellent poem.
Coyote

[Dimples87]

This is so beautiful. It starts out strong and the way it keeps your attention from line to line. Until the very end of the poem, that captivates the entire scene your words create. The dialogue speaks the language of the heart, an ancient language we all speak when we're in love.
Beautiful. . .

[QuothCorvid]

Very strong, I really like this one! You had my chest tight with anticipation as though it were me waiting for him to return. Like a wife waiting for her husband the sailor to return from a long voyage at sea. Nicely done!

[deeps]

Lovely flow of words here. This is deep and meaningful. I like what you are expressing here. Well written!