A Squirrel's Conversation

A Squirrel's Conversation

A Story by texasjane
"

Imagine being able to understand what they were actually talking about.

"
After spending the morning volunteering at a senior center I came home and started watching the activity outside my window. I had listened to so many, I used to be stories.  I do not think... It does not matter.  This story came to mind.

I watched as a squirrel came scampering across the street in front of my house. It is a major highway, and I am glad he got across without any problems. Since there are railroad tracks over there I assume he is here from out of town. No suitcases, just a guess.

My resident, Mr. Sq, scampered down one of the pecan tree branches he had been working on all day. I know there was chatter because they were looking at each other while flickering tails and twitching at each other. The traveler took just a few short hops to the trunk of the tree and ran down the tree branch over to chat with the resident. Their tails were flickering as they met. Mr. Sq waved his arms as if to tell the guy that all this belonged to him. He jumped over to another branch of the tree that had not been picked clean of pecans.

Now, you must understand the ground is covered with pecans. There was no reason to go to so much trouble. Mr. Sq did what he did yesterday; he scampered to a branch out on a twig and snatched the pecan on the end. The traveler followed and did the same on another twig. The two met on a larger branch and proceeded to enjoy their bounty. As they were snacking I watched with great interest the mannerisms Mr. Sq was making. The conversation must have gone something like this.

"I just do this for fun. You know in my previous life I was a lion. Boy, that was the life. I could sleep all day if I wanted. I had a lot of hair around my neck and down my shoulders. All I had to do was sit each day in the sun, lean back once in a while and shake my head like this. Then I would yawn, see, and show everyone my teeth. Like, this see? Do you see my teeth?"

Mr. Sq tilted his head back with his mouth wide open and shook his head. I had seen this before so was sure of what was being said. "Now, I'm a squirrel. The wife doesn't understand I'm working at a handicap. See, when I was a lion it was up to her to do all the killing and getting food. I was just supposed to show up and eat. I always got to eat first too. The only thing I was supposed to really do is service her (you know what I mean) when she said she wanted it. Every once in a while I got stuck with the kids, but even then all I had to do was throw my head back (show'em how good-looking I was) and yawn. You want me to show you my teeth again?"

All the chatter stopped when Mrs. Sq showed up. Once again she is chattering and nudging him in the back of the head and finally taps him on the shoulder with one hand only to nudge him again in the same spot. Then she chatters to the traveler.  "He been tellin' you he was once a lion?" She shook her head. "He tried to tell me that stuff too. I never heard of a lion. All I know is squirrel. And he is a squirrel."

He interrupts her and flickers his tail. "I know what you were in your previous life, you were a mare." She throws both hands in the air, turns, and scampers away down to the ground to gather more pecans. The traveler sat quietly for a few minutes, and then he dared to ask, "What is a mare?"

Mr. Sq answered, "I'm sure she used to be one. That is what they give racehorses when they retire from the track, a nag. They remind them when they are supposed to do stuff. They call them mares."

The traveler scratched his head; said his goodbyes and ran down the trunk of the tree. He chatted with Mrs. Sq for a second, snatched a couple of pecans and stuffed them in his jaw, and ran off down the street.

I know what he was thinking. I could tell from his arm gestures, head scratching, that he was talking to himself.  One short visit had educated him about lions, racehorses, and mares. He shook his head. "The poor guy has it all wrong. When I was a crock all I had to do is show up to get my dinner and make everyone scatter. I did not have to show them my teeth. And what is a yawn? I saw him shrug his shoulders.  "He is wrong about mares too. Mares have black and white stripes on them and run with a bunch of other mares, not racehorses. I don't know what to think of a nag.  If a nag is a horse, I wonder what it looks like?"

Yeah, the poor guy has it all wrong. I notice that he talked about being a lion but never asked about me. I guess I'm glad he did not ask, no tellin' what he thinks a crock is. Being a crock was great, but being a squirrel is a lot easier and dryer. I don't have to wrestle a pecan in order to eat.

He glances over at another tree and saw two squirrels handing upside down. I am sure he said to himself... used to be monkeys… For sure. Boy, now that is entertaining when you are laying in water up to your eyeballs. Pure entertainment they are.  They like to argue about everything. I might go hear their story. I think I have a new hobby. Getting to know the other squirrels in this life.

I may have to listen to a lot of nuts. It is all good. Yes, I like being a squirrel.

Poor guy, when is he going to realize he is a squirrel? He is not what he thinks he used to be, but a squirrel. He is not what he thinks he is going to be, but a squirrel. We both are squirrels. It makes no difference what I was, today I am a squirrel.

Thank you father, I'm doing just fine the way you made me. I'm going to be the best squirrel I can be today. Nothing else matters. Everything else is just plain nuts.

"Now, what was it like being a monkey?" See, he tells himself, I was right. They did use to be monkeys.

© 2021 texasjane


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I always wondered if the female lion just got bored waiting for Fred the provider to get off his fat a*s and catch dinner. Reason being, women have no patience and like jobs done immediately, whereas, men lions will watch their prey, thinking, sooner or later that Gazelle will die of old age and fall into my mouth. Mind you, today the lion would just get Uber eats to deliver the Gazelle. Like a squirrel with ambition.

Posted 3 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

texasjane

3 Years Ago

Thank you so very much for your review. It means a lot to me.



Reviews

Well, Jane 🐿️

I always wondered what squirrels thought about and what it might be like to be reincarnated as one … now, I know. 😏
Nice writing, with loads of imagination and creativity to keep even the most discerning reader entertained and held captive.

Thanks for sharing your excellent writing skills, Lady Texan! ⁓ Richard 🍃

Posted 3 Years Ago


I always wondered if the female lion just got bored waiting for Fred the provider to get off his fat a*s and catch dinner. Reason being, women have no patience and like jobs done immediately, whereas, men lions will watch their prey, thinking, sooner or later that Gazelle will die of old age and fall into my mouth. Mind you, today the lion would just get Uber eats to deliver the Gazelle. Like a squirrel with ambition.

Posted 3 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

texasjane

3 Years Ago

Thank you so very much for your review. It means a lot to me.

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Added on April 10, 2021
Last Updated on April 10, 2021
Tags: Humor, Animals, Future, Past

Author

texasjane
texasjane

Hawkins, TX



About
I a retired Texas widow. I live alone with two dogs. I love to look for the humor in almost everything. I like to pass along a giggle when I can. Wisdom is also fun to pass along. I like to pro.. more..

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