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A Poem by yellowsparrow

Let me lay in dreams
And I want to. I want you to want to.
Carry me in cobwebs
And rescue me from thieves
Lord knows I want to. He wants you to want to.
Surround me in tidal waves,
Cut me into pieces,
Bury me in the haze.
Throw me out when you are done,
But keep me for a while,
Make me believe I've won.
I need you. I want you to need me, too.
Collect the water in your hands,
Blow out smoke in ribbons and bands.
I want you. I need you to want to.

© 2010 yellowsparrow


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Reviews

Really liked the lines:
"Surround me in tidal waves,
Cut me into pieces,
Bury me in the haze."
The feelings of desperation and obsession come across here, as if you'd do anything to have your feelings reciprocated. Lovely piece, good job.

Posted 14 Years Ago


This is so needy and desperate and the imagery you chose to accompany that message was perfect. Everything fell perfectly into place. It was slow yet rushed and loving but desperate.

Posted 14 Years Ago


This is gorgeous. The flow and the meaning are combined in a very creative and interesting way. I love this, really, I do. Thank you for sending it my way. =)

Posted 14 Years Ago


i love this :) it's really goood!!

Posted 14 Years Ago


I liked this. I thought it was confusing, but in a good way, in the sense that it's not obvious what the subject is at first, but its all tied together with a theme, and the reoccurring "I want" lines.
Very enjoyable

Posted 14 Years Ago


Very beautiful.
Love is a tricky thing.
I see a lot of the poems on this site regard love.
Well done on this noble effort

Posted 14 Years Ago


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:)
This reminds me of those thoughts someone has when they really really like someone!!!
Your mind doesn't flow in one distinct thought, it goes everywhere just like hormones...
Well put together for what you were trying to get across.

Posted 14 Years Ago


Wow. A sweet and tender flow of words. So many strong statement in this poem. I like it all. Ending was beautiful. A excellent poem.
Coyote

Posted 14 Years Ago


very nice:)

Posted 14 Years Ago


This is adorable. Oh I love this so much. It makes me smile.

Posted 14 Years Ago



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589 Views
23 Reviews
Rating
Shelved in 3 Libraries
Added on January 16, 2010
Last Updated on January 16, 2010

Author

yellowsparrow
yellowsparrow

NY



About
College junior, creative arts/music history major, loves the ocean, tattoos, and being free. Really would like reviews and thoughts, etc. so please feel free to leave something! more..

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