Decayed Wings

He asked me if it hurt when I fell from heaven

And it wasn't a charming question

My wings were set ablaze

As I crashed through the Earth's atmosphere

Each feather plucked with painstaking vulgarity

I grasped at moons and galaxies

In a desperate attempt

To slow my blazing descent

And the burns still smoke

My scarred back still smoldering 

There went my ignorant purity

As a gritty harsh reality was thrust upon me

"You should know. 

You pushed me."

Reviews

[Lisasview]

Hi Askew,
First read of yours about the fall from innocence..
I recognise what your poem is about because I wrote one with some of the same thoughts...called Innocence...which you might like to read..
I did like your thoughts..
Lisa, now in Spain

[Chris]

An interesting manner toward a chosen partner(?).

[Askew]

This isn't about a partner I chose, It's a piece about abuse and assault and a fall from innocence and purity

[Chris]

Then I apologize... the first piece of yours I viewed spoke of a BDSM lifestyle... I mistakenly assumed.

[Coyote Poetry]

I liked this poem dear Lexi.
"You should know.
You pushed me."
You make me smile this night. Thank you for sharing the amazing poetry.
Coyote

[Julie McCarthy (juliesp..]

Congratulations you got a place

[Julie McCarthy (juliesp..]

Lexi, well done thanks so much for this in my poetry competition loved it

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Another out of the closet of anger and hurt caused by a man. It flows well and the ending is quite revealing as the protagonist felt pushed rather than falling because of a relationship break down?

[gram linski]

I am no very eloquent, just loved the poem,

[BlackPrince]

This is such a powerful piece you wrote here.
I love the way you start the intro. with a cliche phrase men very often use, thinking that they are charming and sleek, as a pick up line to get into a woman's knickers:
'He asked me if it hurt when I fell from Heaven'

Then using the spiritual, divine connotation of that phrase, in reference to the biblical Fall of Man from Heaven, you completely turn the cliche on its head by tackling and outlining the serious ramification of such 'fall', as the poem grasps and transports the reader to another metaphysical dimension:
'My wings were set ablaze
as I crashed through the Earth's atmosphere,
each feather plucked with painstaking vulgarity,
I grasped at moons and galaxies
in a desperate attempt
to slow my blazing descent...'

From that first line, which is a cheesy and cliche line, you take us all into the approximate truth of our general fall whose effects still affect us to this very day.

Then you sum it up with these words:
''You should know.
you pushed me.''
And thus, the first introduction line and the last two lines completely complement each other, making the poem whole in concept, content and context, with such simplicity and depth and picturesque imagery.

This is a very beautiful, truthful and urgent poem that commands automatic respect.

You certainly should follow your dreams of becoming full fledged teacher and published author.
I am a fan of yours already, with only the first poem of yours that I just read.

YOU ARE A GENIUS THE WORLD WILL KNOW ABOUT.
PLEASE KEEP YOUR ESSENCE AND DON'T LET THE FAME CHANGE YOU.

[Askew]

I am so glad you appreciated this poem, I put a lot of effort into creating a certain atmosphere around it. It was somewhat hard for me to put these feelings into words, and hearing what you have to say about all of it makes me feel incredible.
You ought to be careful when calling me a genius though, I don't want my head getting too big, haha.
I'm so grateful that you liked this piece. I cannot thank you enough.

[Brynne]

I dig this, makes me think of resurrection and s**t hahah