UC Poika

UC Poika

"

What's she doing in my world? What's she doing loving my girl?.

"
Bemidji,, MN
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About Me

Did you have fun? Intrigue, supposed villains , vulnerable women, outraged family and friends, my breakdowns have the elements that make up a pretty good fiction, not good enough to write about but acting out our worst fears leaves us looking like Balaam's A*s and not that exactly but a stupid version of it. It ain't easy crashing mentally, but it is cheaper than drugs for in my case the government pays for mine.


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Posted 10 Years Ago


Ever notice how hard it is to write when you are heartbroken except about your own crap inside?

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Posted 10 Years Ago


Does anyone know how to set up an account only my ex could access as a minimum present for all the s**t she went through because of my breakdown? I mean, so she can be mad as hell and not worry I'd get into it except to keep adding money? My lawyer is working on it, but maybe someone has a way that is cheaper.

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Posted 10 Years Ago


I would really like to thank the few real friends like Mac, Jake, and Jessie who despite it all helped me get through it without dying, but I hope the silly part is over; both the dying part, the vengeful parts, and the silly part about Jessie's beautiful photo. Sorry guys, they tell me its an illness that can be medicated. I am not sure if that is an accurate description of all that. But I have to lay it down. Thanks to those who forgive me and to those who don't, I think I understand in a way. It ain't easy forgiving myself. I wish sometimes I too could walk away and never speak to me again. Bye to them who never came back close enough to find out what was wrong. All I did initially was ask God what it was like to be like my worst enemy. He did. He made me almost exactly like they say she is. All this sexy stuff and my new med causes me ED. I could not have done anything about anything I really wanted to do. Absolutely no chance of pregnancy even if I had raped her, which I don't think I would do even in a breakdown. She's an adult. And she is as safe as an adult can be, I was when I ran into Ghana fraud before I even met Jessie. Ha ha God. Funny one.