Murky Water

Trick or Treat

Murky water black has night holds a secret that will cause a fright.

Whether sunlight beam or moonlight glow the hidden evil repeals all hope 

Foolish boy and stupid girl dare you pass this unnatural sight?

Tickle your toes upon my shore and you will be my supper.

Hear them giggle as they come my why

But soon darkness will consume their sounds

and my depths

Will be their new home.

While I patiently

wait for another.

 

 

 

Reviews

[Lorry]

There was always one house, no matter where you lived, that not even candy would tempt you to enter their gates. Even shutting us up as we passed in case we heard her cackle and make a run for it.
Now fast forward 40 years and I am the old curmudgeon that scares them all away 😀

[Cherrie Palmer]

lol, who knew.
It is funny there is always that one house.

[Robert Trakofler]

Mon cherrie... I can hear you saying this to your grands on halloween before you send them off to loot warning them to not become the murky waters bounty...LOL love it:)

[Cherrie Palmer]

How else do you keep the kids out of trouble. A good scary warning--
trespassers beware

[Robert Trakofler]

he he... it keeps getting better:)

[Cherrie Palmer]

I think the flow is much better. I may be done. ?

[Robert Trakofler]

I am not that bold:) but i must say it relates better and I like the giggle line

[R.E. Ray]

Cherrie, I see the devil in the "murky water," not only mocking the "foolish boy" and "stupid girl," but hopeful he'll own them in their naivety. It's a dark, gripping image that sends shivers through the reader. If you're reworking it, you have a good start.

[Cherrie Palmer]

Thank you, I like it over all but I am hoping to smooth out the sound of it out.
The flow seems awkward to me.

[Cherrie Palmer]

Must be reworked maybe tonight

[Ed Hart]

oooooooooooooH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Nimbus Thread]

Goodness this is creepy. Murky selfish evil indeed!

Happy Hallows Eve!

[?]

Hey Cherrie, trick or treat
lol
What a cute lil piece for Halloween. Does get a lil spooky in these Oklahoma woods down here.
Loved this, very cute

[Gomer LePoet]

I'm a stayin away from yer pond. you gots them snakes and wild cows runnin around there. so trick or treat and smell my feet I'll find myself something good to eat.

[...]

Kind of cute in a way, I like this read
it is a sheer delight, Wonderfully written Cherrie!