WHAT WOULD IT TAKE

WHAT WOULD IT TAKE

A Poem by Digvijay Singh


What is it that
rain can not wash clean.
Towering mountain
Dry river bed
Forest trees to green again
Long cries of a town
My skin,
Inside and out.
..
And if even rain can not,
What would it take
To scrape you out of me?
To unlove this love?

© 2019 Digvijay Singh


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Vin
Do rain wash it clean? or do they make it messier? I have alsway stumbled upon this thought.

BTW I loved this. Keep flying

Posted 8 Months Ago


The way your thinking presents itself is the best part about this poem. I love the idea of rain washing things clean & you use many vivid examples to show instead of tell, then your poem takes a humanistic twist (V2) into the romantic aspects of being washed clean of one's futile love longings. I love the harsh sound of this: "scrape you out of me" . . . and your ending is a strong questioning idea, even tho stated so simply "unlove this love"! (we all recognize it's nearly impossible to unlove ANY kind of love!) The only thing I want to encourage you to do is to use more interesting imagery. You present great examples, but the words you use are pretty dry & dull: "dry river bed" . . . "forest trees to green again" . . . you could change just one word & make these more vibrant or dynamic descriptions . . . example: "parched river bed" . . . or "ignite the forest to brilliance again" . . . Of course you would come up with your own ideas, not mine, but this is just to give some ideas. It's not unusual for those who speak English as a second language to forget to pick more interesting words, since you do not have as many words of English in your minds to choose from. I use a thesaurus all the time to remind myself of different unusual interesting words to try! (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie

Posted 8 Months Ago


Digvijay Singh

8 Months Ago

Thank your for the review and suggestions Margie. I agree with what you are saying about my word sel.. read more
barleygirl

7 Months Ago

Most writers do that rushing thing, becuz it's so fun to get the interaction of other writers respon.. read more
WOW! Such strong emotions here, this is so good, I enjoyed this write

Posted 8 Months Ago


Digvijay Singh

8 Months Ago

Thank you for reading
Well written.
The emotions feel strong and the love feels real and passionate. Keep up the good work.

Posted 8 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Digvijay Singh

8 Months Ago

Thank you Khurshid
tangled up in emotions in this one. Well written and presented.

Posted 8 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Digvijay Singh

8 Months Ago

Thank you Kitseth
A good mix of hurt & love

Posted 8 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Digvijay Singh

8 Months Ago

Thank you so much
i can feel the emotion through out this write, this is so well expressed. I enjoyed this write.

Posted 8 Months Ago


Digvijay Singh

8 Months Ago

Thanks for the read Kimmie
That sort of hurt takes time. I think many would wish that a heavy rain would erase all thought and feeling of someone they have loved or love. An expressive and well crafted poem. All good wishes.

Chris

Posted 8 Months Ago


Digvijay Singh

8 Months Ago

Thank you Anne
"...to unlove this love..."

Your words leap from the screen and into the heart of this reader. Again, you captivate!

Posted 8 Months Ago


Digvijay Singh

8 Months Ago

Thank you Kelly
Seems rain can wash anew much except matters of the heart where love abides..time perhaps is more healing...nicely penned piece and deeply expressed

Posted 8 Months Ago


Digvijay Singh

8 Months Ago

Thank you Marie
  Fran Marie

8 Months Ago

you're welcome

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Added on July 13, 2019
Last Updated on July 13, 2019

Author

Digvijay Singh
Digvijay Singh

Faizabad, Uttar Pradesh, India



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