Light Within The Darkness

Your beauty makes my heart skip a beat,

Whenever I look into your eyes,

My heart pounds against my chest,

Whenever you smile,

I feel like I can’t say a word,

You are the light in my darkness

Reviews

[GamingGal]

Pros: Mmm.....I've felt this way. It's wonderful when they're yours, yet tears you to shreds when they aren't, but had been at some point. And usually, even if you're over the person, these feelings don't go away. That's true love. But enough of my reflecting. This is pretty, poetic, and I like it.

Cons: None.

Overall: Short and to the point, not to mention beautiful.

[MandaBear]

i wish a guy would say that to me!!

[.shalynn.009.]

I like this, but it feels a bit...incomplete? It sisn't seem to connect with the title, or give the reader any insight into why all of this means heartbreak to the speaker. The fact that it doesn't end with any kind of punctuation also leads me to believe the story told in this isn't finished, ar at least not all told. But I like it...so far.

[TheFemininePad]

This poem is a decent start to what could be a powerful poem. I would suggest a change of the title of the poem though. Personally I would name it, "Light Within The Darkness." The poem doesn't really match the current title though. Might I also suggest a couple more lines to emphasize your emotions better. Draw from within yourself, and I bet you could come up with something really great.