Our Song

sing to me, o muse!

Our Song

The gentle hymn of the sea swallows us,
the corals bolstering our smiling voices
as we take each other's hands and listen
to our life's ascending soprano.
Together we fit into a niche of blue skies
and crashing waves of happiness and hope.
Only in your soulful eyes am I found,
in a reflection as clear as green saltwater,
the golden fins of the angel fish sweeping
our path to the sandcastle on the shore
where we belong together, humming
harmoniously underneath the yellow apple sun.

Reviews

[happy girl]

That was truly beautiful, like a serene calm place that you could escape to only in a dream, unless youve found the right person to take you there. The imagery and vocabulary was great! You showed a lot of talent when you expressed yourself in this poem. Great job!! :D

[R Lee Cline]

Calm, peaceful, serene, and two people in love. A beautiful poem that I'll confess that I went back and read a few times. Great flow of descriptive words with an aquatic background that makes it unique. Great job....Lee

[Rodrick Franklin McLare..]

I sat upon a moonlight ripple
that glide
refractions along
its very edge
the maiden supple recovered
the star
that dance her finger tip
sung sweetly
the light of her lyric wet
falling crescendo
into endless thrall an sail
ethereal tenderness
billowing dress
her caress the dimmer shimmer
I shiver
an evening ends
mooning
lonely
only
dreaming sweet Sara's Song.

Beautiful Image Sara, go to http://www.andistarr.com/ listen to her Ocean Heart
Andi is my friend and muse Maiden her music is awesome her attitude supernal. Remind me of your poem here. She's on face book too. Love the Angel fish sweeping our path to the sandcastle... ah cute well dressed shy one. I review the Dawn a poetess. Worship the thought of Image a billowing bright sun dress.
Thank you. Neat note to crash with.

[Coyote Poetry]

The poem is beautiful. The ocean and good company can't be any better. The description was amazing in the poem. Made me wish to be walking in the waves and feeling the peace of the sea. A outstanding poem.'
Coyote

[Devons]

This -while a poem without rhyme- has a nice balance to it, and a rhythm that scans* like a good poem should. And it has an ethereal quality.

*NB Not entirely scanning perfectly though: The last two lines -though beautiful- could be better structured, I think.

[Nameless]

Beautiful. Good description.

[Y.F.]

Wow, haven't read something quite like this in a while. I'm very much the romantic type myself, although lately it's getting harder and harder to be optimistic.
I see quite a lot of color in this poem, mostly blue and yellow, sitting on the send, but I could also see some shades of green in the eyes starring back at me.
Superb imagery, flows nicely, and although I don't think rhyming is 'cheesy' in most cases (only if the writer is cheesy to begin with.. ;)), I'm pretty glad this one doesn't.
Great job. Looking forward for more.