Chapter 1: the beginning

Aimen’s Story:

The endless void of black delivered unforeseen fear into my heart; my veins, my soul; even my skin sensed this terrible negative aura enveloping me. Darkness had never struck me as something other than the absence of light - until I felt its pressure; invading my being, pursuing me.

Where was I? My mind fought through the confusion, pupils gradually beginning to focus on the surroundings. An owl's mysterious call was the first sound I heard - in fact it was the only sound breaking through the silence, though it seemed only a few steps away.

I began to follow the owl’s hoot, hypnotized by its lone call. The path felt familiar, yet I struggled to understand why. The last thing I could recall with any certainty was the bitter argument with my brother; this over the TV remote. He had been quite obnoxious.

What had seemed like seconds away felt like forever, before I stood in front of my house. It also appeared more washed out than usual; amid the street lights, the neighbors’ fences and their flourishing vivid green lawns. The house itself was large, built in an ultra-modern style; the sun’s rays often complementing the ivory painted walls. The eloquently designed flower patented bars decorating the first floor terrace added to its dignified appearance. Oddly enough, this modern theme was somewhat disrupted by the large ‘old fashioned’ rosewood gates. Resting amid 15,000 square feet of land, it appeared lavish, screaming perfection from every angle. Sometimes the cars would even fill our side of the lane. The neighborhood kids would ride their bikes and some walked with joy because distress and trials did not burden them yet. This time, my own home felt like a stranger to me, so dark and gloomy. The twilight had arrived and the night began to fall. The lights flickered across the lane.

I didn't bother walking to the front, instead I decided to take the back door. The grass too seemed unpleasant.

   As I peeked through the window, my family was sitting for dinner.

Mom prepared the crispy, juicy mouth watering chicken steaks as usual. Dad worked on his bills, eyes darted into the laptop and my brother complained about the stock market. This seemed like the same old family I once knew, but without me in it.. Their faces seemed to glow with light, and looked like they didn't need me at all. Was I just useless and a waste of life? No. No, I had helped my family, and I did love them. This seemed wrong, but something enforced my feelings telling me how happy they are without me. Why did it seem like I didn’t exist to them? By now they'd be calling the police in search for me. Their life, why did it feel like a compliment without me?

The upsetting familiar energy I felt before whispered into my ear,

     "Look at how happy they are without you. Do you see it? Do you see how worthless you really are?"

My heart was racing as I turned around, quicker than a dashing fox. I tried to reach my house, but every time I advanced towards it, the house just grew farther away from me. Where would I find shelter now? A tall and dark figure stood before me. His eyes... They say the eyes are a window to one's soul. Unfortunately, his eyes were all I could see clearly, and the rest of his face was still a blur. His cracked, dirty and shadow toned lips wore a perverted smile. The smile of a killer. The smile with no mercy or heart. Who was this man? And why was he after me? I hadn’t caused anyone harm.

     "LEAVE ME ALONE!" I cried.

     "You've wrecked everything! GO AWAY YOU SICK FREAK! What do you want from me?!"

Even as my heart poured out in search for the reason, I knew the answer to the pondering question. I realized how difficult it was to breathe. The tears that streamed down my face, touched my cheeks in such a way that made you forget you were even alive.

   "You," He taunted with a grin."That's all I've ever desired."

I felt him trying to move closer to me as I stepped back away from him.

     "D-don't touch me," I stammered. With an attempt to reach far away, He called once more.

     "Don't you see? Nobody can hear you," He mocked in a tormenting voice ."Nobody can see what happened. They won't believe a word you say."

     I struggled to escape but he had locked his arms around me with such a great force that I couldn't break free. Why? Why was he doing this to me? I could not draw his face out. Why was it now that I failed to get out? I wanted to scream but I was entirely mute, vulnerable against him, and he mercilessly abused my body. Oh no. I knew this touch all too well. I suddenly knew those eyes like the back of my hands. I suddenly knew him. Yes, he was my father’s best friend. I knew.

I shrieked, audible for neighbors to hear my hopeful cry, "NO! LEAVE ME THE HECK ALONE!" I roared as I finally broke free of the silence, screaming at the top of my lungs.

I was just a little girl. For what it all seemed, perhaps I was more than the emerald ocean eyed monster I tried to fight within me. I was the limbs in the showering abundance of trust. I was a storm ready to take action within my very own fists.

There seemed to be a burning in my throat as I opened my eyes and woke up to my bedroom, which seemed brighter than usual.

Oh God, not this feeling again. The walls suffocated me, surrounding me, ready to cave in as if they wanted to squish me. I had been dreaming again. It felt so long and real as I gasped frantically for air and I suffocated with the realms of darkness, and with a few seconds of putting myself together I had finally set back into reality. I turned my head to my room. I was home, in my comfortable and feathery bed. It was a rather peculiar dream, and to me, made no sense at all.

Blood rushed into my brain as the numbness of slumber shook my veins back into my senses.

It didn't matter who I was, because I was Amy. My whole body had a beautiful secret history that left memories. It was a phenomenon of engaging simplicity. My head stuck in place in a gentle yet finding posture. My neck jointed and compassionately composed of my chest, back, and lower abdomen. This very chest held the system of my name. Arms stuck in place. These were the comfort of things that made the magic happen. I felt my beautiful identity find it’s very answer. My wholesome legs held me to stand before others would simply try to throw me down. They told me how I could show the way that I stood up for myself. I could breathe, yes. My lungs could feel the rush of a hard matrix. I heard the silence which filled my lonely life. I could feel the texture of my soft blanket and how it began sinking into my heart. And finally, in the most wonderful world of sight, I could see.

Author's Note

suggestions are welcomed