Part 6

Jeffrey is every thing that my father wants for me. He's handsome, intelligent, a hard worker, wealthy, has a degree from Harvard's business school, and, most importantly, he wants to sweep me off my feet. He is the total package, you couldn't ask for more in a man. I am lucky to be able to call him my boyfriend. He's sweet and surprising down to earth for someone who grew up on the lap of luxury. For every stupid, ridiculous, fancy dinner party he drags me to he allows me to drag him to a gory horror movie. Jeffrey loves me, and I love him, but were two very different people. Unlike Sid and I, Jeffrey and I don't compliment each other. Hard as I try, I can't force the connection. It should come naturally, and with Jeffrey it doesn't. I love him but I hate his lifestyle. It is a never ending conundrum that I face every day; to stay with him or to leave him. In the end I always stay. I am determined to make our relationship work. I know that it will please my father and my entire family as well as Jeffrey's for us to wed. But even more, I feel as though my life so far has been a failure. I want at least one thing to work out, to succeed. I refuse to give up.

Jeffrey lives in a large penthouse in the city neighboring my hometown. I've only been there twice, and both times I'd gotten lost. The idea of a house being large enough for me to get lost in honestly disgusts me. Of course, I would never tell Jeffrey that. He wants me to move in with him, but not until we've married. It's another thing my dad loves about him; he doesn't believe in living together before marriage, nor does he believe in having sex before marriage. I've been abstinent for six whole months now, and I've been itching for some sex. Jeffrey is very attractive, and I'd bet he's good in bed. I've been trying almost nonstop for the past four months to persuade him to give into the desires that I know are burning within the both of us, but he's been consistently resistant. I even started dressing sexier than usual for him. Nothing. It's like he's immune to my advances. He insists that it's not me, that he does find me attractive, he just doesn't want to compromise his morals for me. It's hard not to take it personally, though.

For most of our relationship Jeffrey has been pushing me to take him to the apartment where I live. I haven't told him much about it. Actually, I haven't told him anything at all. Especially not that I live with Sid. Jeffrey would be scandalized if he found out. For a grown man he is quite naive. On the night of our seven month anniversary, after Jeffrey had taken me out to dinner at an expensive Italian restaurant, I decided it was time that I invited him over. It seemed like the perfect night because Sid had told me he'd be gone most of the night. His cousin was in town and they were going to hit the local bars. He said not to expect him back anytime before two in the morning.