Falling Stones

Falling Stones

A Poem by hattrick1090

 An Eternity Here

There Could be worse

Our actions have reaped these consequences

If this is it it's not so bad

Left to sway among the breeze

We'll talk of everything we've once shared

Memories of the past float in the air

Every detail we remember will be told once more

Down to each second we will recall

And what happens when we are finished with the past?

To the future we look to see what is to come

Since nothing transpires we must invent one

And after that an infinite more

Forever

© 2010 hattrick1090


Author's Note

hattrick1090
What do you think? Analyze, interpret, and critique and overall thoughts.

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Reviews

I like this poem- it makes use of that abstract idea of memory. The idea of facing eternity in the breeze of the past is interesting.

Posted 11 Years Ago


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Love this!
"And what happens when we are finished with the past?
To the future we look to see what is to come"
My favorite lines^! Overall this is a great poem! :)


Posted 11 Years Ago


this is really good, but i kind of get the feeling its trying to hard.

Posted 11 Years Ago


Great little poem!! This could probably be interpreted in several different ways, but I believe it expresses our need to move on.. The past can never be erased, but the future holds endless possibilities!!! :)

Posted 11 Years Ago


This could be about a person not sure of where to go next in their life, or this could be a very fine description on the human race. Our past actions can't be erased, so we must move forward.



Posted 11 Years Ago


I like this. Short and simple, but to your point.

Posted 11 Years Ago


this is 90% really good. i think that some of the thoughts don't fully correspond with the rest of the poem, but i have the same problem. other than that, i thoroughly enjoyed it, the lack of punctuation is a nice touch, it gives a different flow rather than just being textbook and a.b.c. my favorite part would have to be the simplicity of the words you used, this way it's not congested or convoluted with complexities that most people would need to keep looking up to understand it. good poem. thanks for sharing with everyone =)

Posted 11 Years Ago


great work...i really liked it...

"To the future we look to see what is to come
Since nothing transpires we must invent one
And after that an infinite more
Forever"

Beautiful lines here...brilliant!
just keep those words flowing....you got great potential!!!

keep it up!

regards
Barricade....

Posted 11 Years Ago


It was good it reminds me of my earlier style of poetry which I changed to the stanza and rhyming like a week ago. Practice makes perfect. Good poem though.

Posted 11 Years Ago



This was a nice attempt :)
The choice of words at few places was exceptionally brilliant but the poem lacked in the structure..
The structure was not appealing as it should be, so I think so that you should work on that..
But overall, a great piece of writing!

Posted 11 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


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10 Reviews
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Added on August 9, 2009
Last Updated on January 26, 2010

Author

hattrick1090
hattrick1090

Ashburn, VA



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