Platform 9 3/4

Alex gets ready for his first year at Hogwarts

"I don't understand why I can't go with you dad", Alexander asked as he tried to keep up with the quick strides of his father. 
"You're too young for side-along apparition son", his father replied. "Besides, the train is a good way to make friends. Friends are very important, especially in today's times." "Now you wait here Alex while I go find where those lazy muggles have gotten off to with your luggage." 
Alexander seriously doubted that he would make friends. People were generally scared of him and would fidget nervously when talking to him. It wasn't just kids either, adults were even worse. Some went as far as fleeing if he made eye contact with them. He couldn't blame them. He wouldn't want to be friends with himself either. Who would when you have a dad like his.
Alex noticed two identical red-headed boys talking in hushed tones. Alex wished he had a twin. Maybe then he wouldn't be alone all the time. The twins were trying to keep a straight face as they watched a smaller red-haired boy push a trolly up to platform 9 3/4. The twins looked a couple years older, but the smaller ginger looked about Alex's age.
"Don't worry Ron, you'll just look like a bloody idiot if you don't make it", said the twin on the left. 
An older woman who must have been the boys' mother came storming up to the twins.
"Watch your mouth Fred, or I'll wash it out with soap"! Yelled the woman and just for effect, raised her wand and suddenly a bar of soap appeared out of thin air and pointing threatening at the boy called Fred. 
Fred staggered back and hid behind his twin who was laughing hysterically. The mother then turned towards the smaller boy and said; "Don't worry Ronnykins, you'll do fine". 
"Yeah Ronnykins" the twins said in mocking unison. 
Alex saw the boy's face turn almost as red as his hair before he buried in his luggage. 

Suddenly there was a commotion coming from somewhere behind Alex. He whipped his head around so fast that his long, black, stringy hair fell over his eyes. The crowds of people were parting to let a wizard and two muggles pushing a trolly through. Alex recognized the imposing form of his father walking with the two muggles. One of the suitcases fell off the cart and popped open. The crowd around grew silent looking at the wizard, waiting to see what would happen next. 
"Pick it up" Said Alex's father. His tone made it known that he was not pleased. 
The muggle looked extremely nervous and started fumbling with the latch on the suitcase. He must have been too scared to secure it correctly, because when he picked it up, the case flew open again and all the contents spilled out onto the floor. The crowd let out a collective gasp as Alex's dad pulled out his wand and pointed it at the muggle.
"I'm sorry master Snape, I didn't mean to....please show mercy.... I beg you.....plea-
"Crucio" and his plea was cut off mid sentence. The muggle let out a terrible scream that echoed through the station. The man's body was spasming and the look on his face was awful. 
Some people in the crowd were cheering, some were crying, while others seemed keen on ignoring it.
Alex backed up trying to separate himself from what was happening. He accidentally bumped into the red-headed boy named Ron and quickly apologized. The boy seemed to not notice as he looked very sick. 
"Blimey. I've never seen the crucio cursed used on someone before." Said on of twins looking terrified."
Alex wished he could say the same thing, but he was all too familiar with it. 
"Severus Snape, stop that at once!" Sounded a familiar from somewhere in the crowd. An auburn haired woman was pushing herself though the onlookers towards the scene happening in the middle of the station. Alex watched as his mother stormed over to his father. Alex's dad lost his concentration and the curse was lifted. The man lay sprawled out on the floor gasping and moaning as his parents had an inaudible argument.
Alex turned his back and yet another head of flaming red hair walked over to the group. He was going sightly bald in the back but covered it up with a comb over.
"Oh Arthur", cried the boys' mom as he approached. She flung herself into his arms and sobbed. "It was awful Arthur" Said the woman, clearly shooken up. 
"I know I saw the whole thing Molly". Replied the man. He was shooting scathing looks at Alex's dad.
The mother seemed to compose herself and her tone became much more fiery. "Terrible example he sets. Look at the kids, Arthur, they're terrified! A man in his position shouldn't behave himself like that. Look at Ronny, oh and this boy here", she said gesturing at Alex. Alex's face must have shown the awful feeling he had in his gut, because the woman's face softened as she looked at him. 
"Are you ok dear?" She said to Alex. 
Alex's bright green eyes welled up with tears as he tried to force himself to stay calm. 
"It's ok mate," said on the twins patting him on the back. 
Alex felt shameful. They wouldn't be nice to him if they knew who he was. He forced himself to turn around and walk away, before they could be anymore friendly. He had to strain not to look back. 
A few steps away he collided with someone and fell over. Apparently his parents had finished their argument because when he looked up, he was staring at icy face of his father. 
"You should pay attention to where you're walking" Said his dad.
Arthur hurried over and put his hand on Alex's shoulder and said hurriedly to Snape, "he's so sorry professor Snape. He didn't mean to run into you."
Alex's dad raised his hand to silence him. "I believe my son can speak for himself Weasley." He said curtly.
Arthur stumbled backwards exchanging nervous looks with his wife.
"Leave us" Alex's father said. 
The Weasley's didn't need to told twice as they all scrambled through platform 9 3/4 and out of sight.
Alex couldn't hold it in anymore and as he said, "you don't have to do that dad! How am I supposed to make any friends if everybody is scared of you."
The older Snape looked thoughtfully at his son. "You are too young Alexander. One day it will all make sense."
Alex turned abruptly as he saw his mom walking towards them with the two muggles. The one who was cursed had apparently not fully recovered, because he was moving much slower than the other. They pulled the trollies to a halt at the entrance to platform 9 3/4 and lowered their heads nervously, unsure what to do next. 
Severus made a sweeping motion with his hand letting them know to leave. Alex's mom thanked them and they glanced at her confused before scurrying off. 
"You're too kind to them", said Alex's dad. 
"No, I am just polite" replied his mom smiling. 
They stared at each other for a few seconds, neither backing down before Alex spoke up. "I'm nervous", he confessed. 
"Oh you'll do great honey. You are a brilliant little boy and I know you'll make us proud." Said his mom beaming at him. 
"Yes and if anybody gives you a hard time, I'll have a talk with them in my office." His father chimed in. 
"Severus!" Chided his mom. "You promise me you'll do no such thing.". 
"I promise dear. Now let's Alex loaded up before the train leaves with out him."
They passed through the wall onto platform 9 3/4 and got one of the attendants to load Alex's things on the train. 
"You be good honey" his mom said kissing him on the cheek. "That goes for you too Severus", she said winking at him.
"I'll try Lily Evans Snape". Severus said smiling at her. There was a loud crack and he vanished. 
With that, Alex stepped onto the train waving back at his mom whose, piercing green eyes were tearing up.

Author's Note

Any advice would be appreciated! First time writing so I need some help. Sorry about the weird text format. Couldn't figure out how to change it.

Reviews

[Dani The Unreviewed]

Well, a other than some minor grammar issues, and some words repeated too often, i find this to be a perfect start! i see you managed to mix the content up, quiet well, just like in the original story, to keep the readers attention, which is awesome. It might be because i have read all eight books, and seen all movies, but it is so easy to go along with the story, easy to be in the stories world, effortless connecting with the characters. I'd say that out of a hundred good points, you reached 98. But, i will rate this 100 points. I'll go over it once again, to pin point the grammar stuff, and then to see which words could be replaced by others. Just keep going like this, and it's an awesom story.

[Kaliope]

I love the premise and I think fan fiction in general is an underrated genre so I'm delighted to find this here. Characterization is nicely done, dialog is fine, pacing is good. Style-wise there's a bit room for improvement, but that will come with experience. Let me just point out a few examples:
* The paragraph where you introduce Fred and George - you repeat the word twin/s quite often in close succession. Try to find other words or restructure the sentences. E.g. you could use their names, or call them brothers.
* The sentence "Suddenly there was a commotion coming from somewhere behind Alex" is far too vague, describe what is really happening. What is the exact commotion? Anxious voices, screeching animals, people scampering away or all of that?
* In general you have included very few descriptions of the scenery. Now that might not seem like a problem since this is written for Harry Potter fans and I guess each of us has a more than clear picture of platform 9 3/4 in his/her mind but a few descriptions here and there - not just visuals, but sound, smell, weather, etc. would make the scene even livelier.

Now please don't worry too much about what I just said, just keep in the back of your mind. Writing - like every other craft - takes a lot of practice and imho you're off to a very good start. I enjoyed this chapter and I'm curious as to how the story will continue!

[Rudi J.P. Lejaeghere]

Well, I'm not the best reviewer and I'm not a native English speaker. But I have to say that it's very interesting. It reads very fluently and as a Harry Potter fan I'm glad to revisiting this world. Very interested how it will go. I promiss you to follow this.

[jbwest31]

Thanks for the feedback! It's always nice to see another Harry Potter fan. I hope I can do the series justice.

[Skai Rain]

Great work on this chapter, but I find it kind of distracting to read with the white words on the black backdrop. If you change this it may be easier for your readers. Thank you for sharing!

[Jennie Baron]

Thanks to JJ for bringing this to my attention and thanks for the chance to revisit the Harry Potter world. And what an interesting twist at the end...Lily ends up with Severus and they have a son together?? I simply must read on just because of that.