Entrance in My Life

Entrance in My Life

A Poem by Raj Sahu
"

The poem is based on poet's love whom he always wishes from God and at last his wish is granted.

"


In the deserted lonely square,
In which the sad sand smear;
I was waiting for a saviour,
who would be my carrier.

My thirst of love was too severe,
That I want one to quench it mere.
And our Lord, the God; heard my wish
and granted it, which was too astonish.

Adorable and Admirable, Honest and Amiable
Decent, Kind and altogether Lovable.
And what qualities shall I reveal
as there are none to conceal.

Forlorn and Feeble was I,
and was taking a deep sigh.
But now there's delight and joy
with my love I will enjoy.

Far worse I had lived,
and for many things deprived.
But now I will love you my dear,
and I will get rid of fear.

© 2017 Raj Sahu


Author's Note

Raj Sahu
Ignore Grammar Problems

My Review

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Featured Review

“Forlorn and Feeble was I,
and was taking a deep sigh.
But now there's delight and joy
with my love I will enjoy."

When there is a first contact with our love, the person is so elated and wishes that the love should remain forever with him.
Now, about your work, the image you paste is very beautiful and the vivid description of the love, saviour, God keeps me reading the entire poem. How was your suffering and how you rejoiced after his entrance is worth noting. Looking for more of your works.

Posted 1 Year Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Raj Sahu

1 Year Ago

Thank you very much. I appreciate your review.



Reviews

Just as in my first review of your writing in the starved stomachs poem, rhymes-not a fan. But you employed some uncommon rhymes, so it was not at all a bother to my enjoyment. The only one I had an issue with was "too astonish." I realize to ignore grammar problems such as this, but for me individually, this kind bothers me when the incorrect grammar actually completes the rhyme needed as it should be "to astonish" or "too astonished." The former would possibly change the desired meaning of the line while the latter would ruin the "perfect" rhyme. However, astonished would still work in the rhyme actually. Of course, it could also be changed to "to my astonish" which might keep the meaning as well as the rhyme.
....Haha, you see this is why I often detest rhymes. They stand out so much as to take away my focus on other matters. But to be fair, other than that single rhyme, the rest were really rather pleasant.
Finally, as to the content of the poem, I really love that you spoke of not romantic, humanly love, but of godly love--a love poem to God of sorts. This is rather impressive to do, and I sincerely applaud you for it~

Posted 1 Year Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Raj Sahu

1 Year Ago

Thanks a lot!
Again thanks for this beautiful read and poetry
thanks for entry into another of my weekly competitions i like this a lot i wish you well

Posted 1 Year Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Raj Sahu

1 Year Ago

Thank you.
Julie McCarthy (juliespenhere)

1 Year Ago

as i said to another contestant 86 to judge and comment on its very hard there are no losers here if.. read more
Thanks for entering my competition love this beautiful

Posted 1 Year Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Raj Sahu

1 Year Ago

Thank you!
Congratulations on your 1st place, Raj!

Posted 1 Year Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Raj Sahu

1 Year Ago

Thank you dear.
You writes love poetry quite well dear!

Posted 1 Year Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Raj Sahu

1 Year Ago

Thank you!
May you carry this happiness all through your life. Poem is well penned.

Posted 1 Year Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Raj Sahu

1 Year Ago

Thank you!
Love..beautiful words..er..nice..

Posted 1 Year Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Raj Sahu

1 Year Ago

Thank you.
“Forlorn and Feeble was I,
and was taking a deep sigh.
But now there's delight and joy
with my love I will enjoy."

When there is a first contact with our love, the person is so elated and wishes that the love should remain forever with him.
Now, about your work, the image you paste is very beautiful and the vivid description of the love, saviour, God keeps me reading the entire poem. How was your suffering and how you rejoiced after his entrance is worth noting. Looking for more of your works.

Posted 1 Year Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Raj Sahu

1 Year Ago

Thank you very much. I appreciate your review.
It is a very nice feeling when one's love enter in his/her life..you are just on the seventh heaven..you depicted the same feelings through this work..keep writing

Posted 1 Year Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Raj Sahu

1 Year Ago

Thanks a lot!
It is very interesting to note that when you found your love you are free from fear. Love is such a vast concept that we mortals know only a minuscule about it. Thank you.

Posted 1 Year Ago


Raj Sahu

1 Year Ago

Thank you so much!

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1084 Views
24 Reviews
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Added on May 4, 2017
Last Updated on May 10, 2017
Tags: Love, My Life, Entrance, Saviour, Forlorn, Amiable, Adorable

Author

Raj Sahu
Raj Sahu

Burhanpur, Madhya Pradesh, India



About
Myself Raj Sahu from the historic town of Burhanpur, Madhya Pradesh, India. I had completed my high schooling with flying colours from Choithram School, Indore in Humanities stream and was first in or.. more..

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