Chapter III: One Last Time

Tom says Goodbye.

I had trouble adjusting. Since my first transformation I was... different. I was taller, more fit, and had a stronger will to do what needed to be done. It felt awkward. Now, the only reason I’m telling you this unimportant fact is so that I don’t get choked up over... You know, don’t get emotional about... God damn it... We held Izzy’s funeral that weekend. I don’t know if we can even call it a funeral. What happened; what the equinox did to her, defiled her beyond death. She was essentially erased. There were no remains... Not even bones...there was nothing... Instead we buried a mannequin in a clearing in the woods... It was dressed in her favorite dress. It was white, with blue ruffles around the bottom and flower lace around the chest. She had looked so beautiful in it... Now I’ll never get to see her in it again... I’m not going to lie and say that I didn’t cry. There’s no shame in loss. I lifted a hunk of stone out of the earth, with the initials I.K. carved into it. I bent down on one knee to place the flowers on her grave. Alex decided it was best to leave me alone awhile. Izzy’s spectre materialized behind me. I let my face mask absorb my small tears. 

“I will always love you...” I began, almost choking on the words. “You and no one else... I just... wish I could’ve said goodbye... Held you one last time... Touched your skin... Kissed your lips...” I sighed sadly, looking down at the flowers. ”It’ll never be enough... And this whole ‘spectre’ thing is just a god damned curse. To be able to see you, but not feel you. To speak to you, but not hear your gentle voice.” I took off my glasses, using my sleeve to wipe my bright blue eyes. “It’s not enough.” I sat back, folding my legs and sitting on the ground. Izzy, well, her spectre, sat next to me and smiled. It tried to formulate words, but specters have no vocal chords. She stopped and gestured instead. She placed a fist over her heart and held her hand out to me. 

This was our symbol; our bond. Before every trip, every battle, every time we could possibly get separated, we would put a fist over our hearts and hold each other’s hand.

I placed a fist over my heart, and pretended to grasp her hand, knowing well that if I actually tried, I would feel nothing but air. “I’ll miss you.” I said finally, my voice quavering. She mouthed the words back. “It’s time for you to go, my love.” I smiled at her through the mask. “I won’t have your paradise delayed.” I placed my hand on her grave.

I gripped it tightly as I let her fade away, so hard that I left an indent in the rock with my metallic hand. “You will be avenged.” I said to the air, in a cold, steely voice. I put my glasses back on and fixed my coat. I walked out of the clearing and back to our camp, where Alex was making dinner. She could see the darker streaks of wet fabric in my mask. I clutched my chest, for more reasons than just the pain of the bullet wound. Alex stopped what she was doing and walked up to me. She wrapped her arms tight around me and I rested my chin on her shoulder. 

“We’re all we have now.”  She said, squeezing me tighter. I wrapped arms around her as well. 

“I’m not going to lose you. Not while I can help it.” I replied, a determined tone in my voice. The embrace was broken by the smell of well-cooked game on the fire; the dinner that Alex needed to prepare. 

Tomorrow we agreed that I would do the hunting. Alex needed some time to herself to process what was going on, and I really needed to kill something. Unfortunately, most of my weapons were in the house. Alex went to get them, seeing as there’s no way in hell I’m going back there.

My bullet wound healed surprisingly quickly. In just 10 days from the incident it was completely gone. Alex and I agreed that it must be some effect of Ikai. It was time to get back in business. They knew I was back; and I was going to show them that they’ve only seen a fraction of what I’m capable of. I climbed on top of Hell’s Bolt, and waited for Alex to get on behind me. She kept insisting that I make a bike for her, while I kept insisting that she was lame. I knew exactly who to look for, and knew exactly how to find him.