Newton's Cradle

Newton's Cradle

A Poem by GunMetal
"

Sleep is where I find the worlds that want to exist.

"
I.

I dreamt of a skeletal landscape
that I once called home.
I could see dead olive clouds,
the last breath of Atlas,
as if the sky was decaying, 
the earth itself in rigor mortis.
My lungs breathed heavy in a noose of forsaken air
beneath where once there might have been some kind of God
shaking his head in awe
at what we could accomplish.

Even at the world’s ellipsis
the people around me seemed to continue
as if their life sentence
wasn’t grammatically disastrous.

I awoke from it all
having no disasters left.
Just spaces between words
from which to continue.



II.

Dayna kept the lights on in her dream journal
for fear of relinquished nightmares.
She had every reason to believe
that she was worth her weight in fire

Perhaps, the next time she woke up
standing on the edge of her rooftop
she would be an angel before she hit the ground.

She writes, I am always searching for something.



III.

I am not all the little things that remind you of me.
I was never the vapor.
I was always the heat.
There is an audience of dust, and stone, and landscape
where my shadow waits for you.

It’s alright to take your time.
Bring your breath.
Set the stage with every step.

Your tumbleweed heartbeat
is going to wander
until it reminds you of me.
I was never the dream.
I was always the dreamer.

Dying will be your greatest performance.
Survival will be your masterpiece.



IV.

There is always some kind of wound on me…



V.

You refuse to let go of what hurts you most
as though somehow
they validate you.
And such a belief 
might make it true.

I wish you could walk with me in my dreams
so you can see
that what I can imagine
is not limited to
what I can produce.



VI.

...I am always healing.
I still haven’t found what I’m looking for.



VII.

Close your eyes and count to courage.
I won’t be gone for long.

I’m coming back as autumn leaves
and impossible colors we cannot see.

I'm coming back as carnivorous galaxies,
star collisions we'll never know about.

I'm coming back as discord,
as the smell of distant thunder,
and the sensation of sneezing.

I'll be coming back

so alive.



VIII.

Start.

A breathing moment of coherency.
It fades seamlessly into a shuffle of thoughts
into a timeless dreamlike vision
into a dulling pulsing unconsciousness…

and then a start again.

My body wanting to sleep.
My mind refusing to let it.
I drift into ellipsis…

© 2012 GunMetal


Author's Note

GunMetal
I'll meet you on the other side.

My Review

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Featured Review

I read up to V. then had to stop because I literally pounded my hand on the table and shouting YES, this poet, this GREAT man, CAN write! Then I went back to read the rest with my face as close to the screen as I could get. Your dream state is a genius Masterpiece. I have to keep this, I have so much more I want to say, but instead…just…thank you

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

GunMetal

8 Years Ago

Wow, thank you so much =)
I'm quite flattered! I'm glad you enjoyed it.



Reviews

Second time reading this and I still want to clap or jump around or something. This is just phenomenal. Every line is a piece of art and it's just...wow

Posted 7 Years Ago


This is really good! wow great job :)

Posted 7 Years Ago


You need to be published. You have more talent than I have seen on this site in way too long. I can only say that I am astonished.

Posted 8 Years Ago


i like it, well done sir.

Posted 8 Years Ago


Some smart writing here. I remember in one of my psych classes having to keep a dream journal. Every morning, right as the dreams were still fresh, before they disappeared back under the water, I'd write them down. Had the notebook right on my alarm so I wouldn't forget. It was the eeriest thing to read them back some months later. It was like self-induced deja vu.

Some of your lines are brilliant, combining heartbreak with reverie:

Your tumbleweed heartbeat
is going to wander
until it reminds you of me.

Enjoyed this.

Posted 8 Years Ago


.. I am awed.. the style reminds me of something or someone I can't place my finger on but whoever it is must be amazing, because this is. "Who do you wanna be?" "This guy, right here." is how I feel right now.

Posted 8 Years Ago


I like it. "My lungs breath heavy in a noose of forsaken air" cool.

Posted 8 Years Ago


You know, sometimes I worry humanity will run out of ideas? That somehow we will have mined our creative resources dry. It's poems like these that prove me wrong. The imagery was absolutely beautiful and unique, and I am sure you get this a lot but kudos to you man, for being a brilliant writer.

Posted 8 Years Ago


I've been meaning to review this, so remedying the mental itch.

I. World’s ellipsis- dang on that. Its state in rigor mortis is an unnerving vision of what a panorama of blank mental spaces could’ve dug a crevice in our subconscious judgments,and to what we are called for of our unwarranted existence and complacency. (Also, noted your usual discreet quirky flavor, melancholic in “as if life sentence wasn’t grammatically disastrous” )
Boom! You established the readers in an unsettling diorama and hinted us to buckle up for an astral odyssey.

III.So much love on the form and rhythm. ”There is an audience of dust, and stone, and landscape “- I like how it resounded in my head. Your usage of “and” mattered most. There is an involuntary tie up that mentally occurred in me in the last 2 sentences vis-à-vis II.

IV.the loudest boom!the zing part. couldn’t grasp the effect if it wasn’t italicized.

VI. I like how the voice was catching up to some missing chapters. He figured resilience is nothing but a temporary remedy.

VII.It escalates only to be cut midway. Last sentence was a breathtaking halt.

VIII. Epic denouement and epic overall tie up. I imagined a stream of astral waves sucked in a wormhole, reshuffling in hazy,rapid motion. but there is a tenacity in his subconscious desire of dwelling in that mental landscape.

I won’t try to theorize but I can’t help but spot an allusion of the dream state to Newton’s free fall experiment, and how we sink in our subconscious thoughts is nothing less than a gravitational pull.

Brilliantawesomeamazingphenomenalepiciwannastabmyknee.

Now remind me to buy you a pizza as well.









Posted 8 Years Ago



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Added on August 13, 2012
Last Updated on August 13, 2012

Author

GunMetal
GunMetal

Wish You Were Here, Alta Loma, CA



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