Lament

 

Break me on the shore

Of the stone cold

Summer day

Breathe no more for

I have drowned

In blossom May

You are the cold August wind

That shrieks at my door

Crushing me as I fold

Break me on your shore

Your grey stone heart

I hear

Spring now in silence roar

Shut the heavy steel door

Once there was love

Now only war

 

Reviews

[Daisie Vergara (Dhaye)]

Not all love stories have their happy endings. It only happens in a fairytale.

I really like the last two lines which is very effective:
"Once there was love
Now only war"

[MOON]

Thanks Dhaye for the review.
Go well!

[J. J. Nightingale]

Sometimes ending will not go gently into that night
They must roar .. roar against that man's might ..lol ..

Powerful lines .. and emotions ....

Jazz

[MOON]

Thanks jazz, take care!

[J. J. Nightingale]

:) ..............

[Baby Ricochet]

Some great lines and rhymes here. Outstanding Moon

[MOON]

Thanks so much, take care!

[...]

This is quite sad and yet beautifully written in season of a lost love still felt by a cold wind in august. Always enjoy your art, dear moon :)

[MOON]

Thank you Lynn , love when you stop by!

[Stella Armour]

a very sad lament, beautifully written i could feel the harsh coldness of a grey tide washing over you in the middle of what was summer..

[MOON]

Thanks Stella , most appreciated!

[Glen Yumang Manese]

The fluidity of this piece and the story line in a relatively short amount of time... The rhyme scheme doesn't hinder the lines...

A relationship come in Summer, gone by first of Spring and the memories are just passing by early Autumn breeze... and what was triumph made is now fleeting and rages war...

I hope I gave this the review you where looking for in your lines of this verse...

[MOON]

Glen I hope it speaks to you in some way its open to interpretation.
Thanks
for stopping by
take care

[Coyote Poetry]

A amazing poem my Poet friend. Written with the skill of old. Description took reader from the days of spring to the coldness of war. Love can change very quickly. Thank you for the excellent poetry.
Coyote

[MOON]

Thanks Coyote for stopping always love it when you do .
Take care!

[Prritiy]

a sad heart where peace has been shattered. nice write accompanied with interesting picture.

[MOON]

Thanks Prrtiy , take care!

[Prritiy]

You are welcome, Have a lovely day :)

[SHEEMA HUQ]

I feel so moved by the cool August wind, the mood and tone of this fine poem, masterfully pieced together.

[MOON]

Thanks Sheema love your input.
All the best.

[Frieda P]

Even amid the summer heat you can feel the chill when love has shut the door in your face, outstanding read MOON.

[MOON]

Thanks Frieda always appreciate your comments.
All the best.