Sledgehammer Disaster (Title by YumnaKay)

Sledgehammer Disaster (Title by YumnaKay)

A Poem by DylanChase
"

A piece I had edited by YumnaKay...

"
A tapestry forever falling 
to the sound of paper gravity.
 
I was never more than rabies 
​... ​
lined with sanity.

My clouded rubies secluded me 
from daily activity.

Riddled with active limited abilities,
my simplicity is inherently a durability,

because -- when breath deserts me, 
I'm left; wretched 'n' berzerking,

earning the gurneys 
that burn me with disin
​f​
e
​c​
tant.

When slurping at the chemicals 
like weapons that be jerkin'...

My tensions etched 'n' blessed 
... in dirt lessons.

I'm the essence 
of murkin' denizens of burden.

I'm earnin' nothin' 
as beat-back humbling turns ~ worse.

Cursed and reverting to 
sledgehammer disaster a last hit and ---

I'm hammered ~ of 
worth.

© 2017 DylanChase


Author's Note

DylanChase
Like the title and description say... YumnaKay is the sole editor of this one... I just wrote it all in a big block of words... Might be seeing more of her editing skillz on my work soon... Enjoy!

My Review

Would you like to review this Poem?
Login | Register




Featured Review

This is a beautiful piece, so full of emotions and you sumed it up perfectly with that last line. "hammered~of worth." I have felt this many times but, I was affected in a less aggresive manner, I think. More like, slowly being drained or cracking little by little under pressure until everything inside breaks free. This is why I love reading people's work. I love hearing how other people experience emotion, because we're all affected differently. Thank you for sharing your heart with us!

Posted 3 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

DylanChase

3 Years Ago

No problem, Flame, thank you for so kindly relating... It fills my heart with warmth to know you too.. read more



Reviews

I was never more than rabies lined with sanity. That is a fantastic line in a great piece of poetry. Nicely done.
-Richard

Posted 3 Years Ago


Ah, such an imposing and breathtaking ending! Flowed beautifully. Loved it!

Posted 3 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Zoya

3 Years Ago

A breath of fresh air? Lol. You're funny xD. And of course, have some mercy on us readers...your poe.. read more
DylanChase

3 Years Ago

I always do, friend, I always do, haha... A very welcome encouragement, and the same to you, Zoe
Zoya

3 Years Ago

Yep, I will too. Much thanks!
very well written. well done

Posted 3 Years Ago


1 of 2 people found this review constructive.

DylanChase

3 Years Ago

Thank you, Jay
It's strange - I read a bunch of the other reviews here and I did not get any of the emotions others did from this! Maybe I'm just odd! But this hit me as you simply rapping and riffing on the more depressing elements of your life. Don't take that as criticism, it's not - this poem is both strong and vibrant, but I see you on a stage with a mike, rapping your heart out with an overload of pain and aggression. Did I get it all wrong?


Posted 3 Years Ago


1 of 2 people found this review constructive.

DylanChase

3 Years Ago

What the heck... How did I miss this...
Thanks so much for this, and you are right...
.. read more
The Iron Horseman

3 Years Ago

Lol! Yep, stories are important, but please don't lose those great, wacky images.
DylanChase

3 Years Ago

Heh, well... Difficult to juggle the expectations of the world with personal direction, they do not .. read more
Your a talented poet. Well penned.

Posted 3 Years Ago


1 of 2 people found this review constructive.

DylanChase

3 Years Ago

Thank you, Stephanie, means much to hear...
That last line..
'I am hammered of worth'
Poignant to the core!
Nice editing @yumnaKay✌️

Posted 3 Years Ago


1 of 2 people found this review constructive.

DylanChase

3 Years Ago

Thanks, Krutika... Stellar editing, right?
This work is one that made me think a lot about its meaning, and it's always a good surprise to find work like this. I think it's about somebody who can't see past their current lifestyle, they get humbled / knocked off of their pedestal in life, and they have to work hard until they hammer out their old flaws and are of worth. That's what I got from it: this was an exceptional piece of work.

Posted 3 Years Ago


1 of 2 people found this review constructive.

DylanChase

3 Years Ago

You take grand meaning from my simple words, and rightfully... You place them in a star system of di.. read more
While reading this i was singing it. The rhythym is very mellodyious.

Posted 3 Years Ago


1 of 2 people found this review constructive.

DylanChase

3 Years Ago

YAY...! That is what I wanna hear... Thanks very much...

First Page first
Previous Page prev
1
Request Read Request
Add to Library My Library
Subscribe Subscribe


Stats

1407 Views
34 Reviews
Rating
Shelved in 2 Libraries
Added on July 5, 2017
Last Updated on July 5, 2017
Tags: Poetry

Author

DylanChase
DylanChase

Denver, CO



About
When you have no words... Go find them! They get lost easily... (Seriously) more..

Writing

Related Writing

People who liked this story also liked..


A Lover's Gaze A Lover's Gaze

A Poem by Ethan