A Vampire's Bite

Some non-vampires often desire to be bitten. This is written from their point of view.

  A Vampire's Bite

 

I sit silently waiting

And wanting your touch

Across the room gazing

I need you so much

Inside me your goal

Will find such power

Releasing my soul

My blood you devour

Sinking deeper you go

Your fangs blood red

Draining me so

Too much to be said

I tense up with fear

Knowing the pleasure

The feeling so near

I will always treasure

My fate you will seal

As you hold me so tight

Your strength I will feel

From your violent Bite! 

Author's Note

Thank you for all your comments. I'm still learning and hope to get better the more I write. Please let me know what you think...

Reviews

[JenLyn]

This was a great write it flows well and the rhyme scheme it nice. I enjoyed reading it, unlike some poems about seduction etc. this one had speed to it, it didn't drag so it made you want to read it even more. If you're into vampires you should check out my poem "Love Letter To A Vampire" but honestly I think your poem is better. Good job! Keep it up! Oh and as far as learning and getting better all it takes it practice, and reading other poetry helps as well, so write until you feel like your hand is going to fall off. I look forward to reading more of your writing. :)

[sera bela]

wow! I love this poem. Very original and a great read! Keep it up!

[Danni]

I love all things vampire related :) And this poem is great! It flows nicely, and its easy to read. x

[sabre]

Like Elissa, I also am not a big vampire aficionado, but you do put across a fine picture of submissive wanton need ...

[Elissa; the genuine art..]

This is fantastic. Usually I'm not into the whole vampire thing,
but the seduction is this piece was excellent.
It was fast paced and quite enjoyable to read.
Can't wait to read more from you!

-Elissa :)

[deeps]

This is really amazing!
Wonderful flow and rhyme.
Very well written

[A]

I REALLY liked this! To be honest, I didn't think I would because I'm not a big vampire fan but this poem was really good! I love the flow of your words and how discriptive and captivating this piece is. Great poem! :)

[Tina Kline]

This is really nice, very erotic and sensual. I think you did a wonderful job capturing the desire a person who wants to be bitten can feel when they finally are experiencing what they wanted so terribly bad. Really nice job.

[Daydreamer54]

Wow it has a wonderful flow to it. This was kind of intresting to me since i never read a poem about vampires. :)

[alison13]

this is a good writing. i haven't read a poem about vampires for so long already that it's kinda refreshing, especially since i once had an obssesion with vampire novels. good job. :)