Rough Draft Forevermore

Rough Draft Forevermore

A Poem by jacob erin-cilberto


Rough Draft Forevermore 

 

 

 

drafts, pre-writes

re-writes 

themes

dreams

choices in prosaic terms

confined to a certain form

introductions to conclusions

and all that is in-between

that is what we mean.

 

life relayed to the page

pretending to be sage

 

capturing an autobiography 

in poetry.

 

we realize

we would be more wise

to revise 

 

again and again

and admit we are a work in progress

never a finished poem...

 

 

 

erin-cilberto

11/27/19

© 2019 jacob erin-cilberto


My Review

Would you like to review this Poem?
Login | Register




Reviews

You know it's funny sometimes when I write it is a neverending revision, and other times I'm satisfied with just putting it on paper.
With the final punctuation I'm on to something new.
I think I live life that way too. At times careful and revised, at other times straight from the hip without looking back. I guess the key is to know when to apply either approach.


Posted 1 Week Ago


jacob erin-cilberto

1 Week Ago

your review makes so much sense...in life...me too...mostly i just go by the seat of my pants..like .. read more
So brilliantly captured Jacob, that I'm left wondering if it's safe for you to ever edit this. It might just be that "one" we can never better and makes us put the pen to bed for good.
I wonder sometimes that it would be interesting to have real life collaborations, with those that were part of our life and see how prosaic there words would be about us and what actually happened.
Methinks mine would be similar to the deleted scenes from platoon, in relation to my perspective of events.
At best, i am but fragments of broken lines, from a pamphlet, thinking I'm an encyclopedia 😀
Long may your words remain so incomplete and your paper and ink, well stocked.

Posted 1 Week Ago


jacob erin-cilberto

1 Week Ago

thank you for your thoughts on this...and yes, real life collaborations...interesting thought..
read more
This is how I feel as of late. Shouldn’t post a thing before letting a couple decades go by and see if I know any better. But, my immediate gratification sensor is on the fritz...so, here it goes!!!

Posted 2 Weeks Ago


jacob erin-cilberto

2 Weeks Ago

done and move on...that seems to be my regiment.
thank you for sharing, Crowley,
j.
I think this relates to any 'personal' production, not just poetry.
I do a fair amount of art work and I am always looking at potential upgrades.
Much easier to do with poems.
Deep thinking

Posted 2 Weeks Ago


jacob erin-cilberto

2 Weeks Ago

i am so glad you could relate this to your artwork, Dave.
thank you for sharing that...
.. read more
another great poem diving into the psyche of every writer, as Kerouac once said Life is a great undulating unfinished poem, great stuff

Posted 2 Weeks Ago


jacob erin-cilberto

2 Weeks Ago

i never have been able to get all the way through "on the road"
to me, a lot of nothing...how.. read more
gram linski

2 Weeks Ago

Mexico city blues, is one of my favourite reads, for me he has always been a poet his novels are sec.. read more
jacob erin-cilberto

1 Week Ago

sometimes great description beats any action...
theory, and perhaps in conventional wisdom, all poems last forever. Maturity means that even the first poems need revision. It is intellectual suicide at best and an excessive compulsion at the very least to stifle endings in the first place....This way there's always something to be in love with...dana

Posted 2 Weeks Ago


jacob erin-cilberto

2 Weeks Ago

thank you, dana....damn...why don't i revise...oh well, i never grew up. And probably never will.read more
i read somewhere that there is good poetry in inspiration but the genius lay in the revisions. ;) i especially hear your V3 the longer i write and post here at the Cafe' ... we really do leave our lives laid out in pieces .. makes it even more an honor to read people's "stuff" ... a work in progress indeed ... even St. Paul had his thorn in the side.
E.

Posted 2 Weeks Ago


jacob erin-cilberto

2 Weeks Ago

thank you for your insightful review, E.
j.
The need of expression is constant, how we say it, gets evolved over time. Yet, for a poet at heart, it's the process of creating, of expressing, that's vital to joy and not the finished poem.

Posted 2 Weeks Ago


jacob erin-cilberto

2 Weeks Ago

i absolutely agree with what you have said here...it is not any accolades we might received for a fi.. read more
Jacob,
It takes discipline and knowledge to re-write, eliminate words and phrases to streamline our poetic message. To trim our ego and not stubbornly fall in love with our work. Maturity goes along way.
Comparing how we live our life and writing poetry is spot on. The same positive work ethic is necessary for both. Your poem reveals your wisdom.
Peace and Happy Thanksgiving,
Richie b.


Posted 2 Weeks Ago


jacob erin-cilberto

2 Weeks Ago

and yet i have not much discipline, i'm afraid...
since i mess with them as i am writing them.. read more
richieb

2 Weeks Ago

Jacob,
I do see my writing in different light after reading poems or st.. read more
jacob erin-cilberto

2 Weeks Ago

i like that...."as dough to rise" especially pertinent for me because i spent so many years making p.. read more
I've never written a poem which I consider finished. I tinker with them, often years later. I am what you call a poetic meddler. You my friend are fortunate enough to have a muse who stands for no nonsense. I know you compose what you are given, publish it and move on to the next piece. That takes confidence and discipline. Only today I looked at a computer file with hundreds of cast offs :)) some of them didn't go further than two lines. You are gifted, you don't need to revise and what's more your considerable output is always at a consistently superior standard. You always hit the jackpot, even though you may doubt it yourself. Love this poem, it sums up everything I have ever written. A continual work in progress. Each poem like a tooth extraction :)

Chris

Posted 2 Weeks Ago


jacob erin-cilberto

2 Weeks Ago

not sure i don't NEED to revise...just don't...but thank you for your kind words, Chris...and i thin.. read more

First Page first
Previous Page prev
1
Request Read Request
Add to Library My Library
Subscribe Subscribe


Stats

142 Views
14 Reviews
Rating
Added on November 28, 2019
Last Updated on November 28, 2019

Author

jacob erin-cilberto
jacob erin-cilberto

Carbondale, IL



About
Originally from Bronx, NY, I live in Carbondale, Illinois...teach English at two community colleges and have been writing and publishing poetry since 1970. Friending works two ways. If we have had .. more..

Writing

Related Writing

People who liked this story also liked..