Dissentia

Dissentia
(03.30.07)

Economic wars leave humanity further enslaved,
Better ways are engraved on the murals,
In the tombs of ancestor angels,
In the wombs of our daughters and mothers,

Destroying or hording natural resources leaves humanity starved,
Masses of lives carved out of leftovers,
Bodies too hungry to feed our minds,
So we feed on violence,
Our hunger overtaking our willingness to coexist,
If my life is lost then yours is meaningless,
So underground economies give us meaning,
Fuel us with the energies to survive,
To temporarily thrive,

These gatekeepers of historical information,
The freedom of information cannot be an act, is greater than a play,
It is the foundation of human freedom,
Truth in abundance,
False transparency hides a genuine intent,
Ulterior motives are the death of consent,
To these things I respectfully dissent.

Reviews

[Mary]

"Bodies too hungry to feed our minds,
So we feed on violence,
Our hunger overtaking our willingness to coexist,
If my life is lost then yours is meaningless, "

That's powerful.
And I love the last line, too.

"To these things I respectfully dissent"

oh, there's too many lines I love, I should just copy and paste the whole poem here! =)
Makes me think of the books Daniel Quinn writes...

[Kyle Francisco]

Wow. I had to read it again. I find it beautifully disturbing because your message is so true.

You ability to manipulate words to flow is great.

So, what made you write it?

[Satine]

One doesn't often read a social commentary on the war, oil, the Patriot Act etc. within the confines of such an elegant write. Your word choices are excellent. My favorite lines would have to be;

"Better ways are engraved on the murals,
In the tombs of ancestor angels,
In the wombs of our daughters and mothers,..."

Satine

[Lyrical Love]

Okay...how do I start to reward you with my lyrics for the joy!!--I experienced in feeling the passion... and zeal you have used to address issues that we desperately want others to feel. Great job! Like my dear friend says, three snaps in a circle!!!

Standing to applaud U!!

[Nevah Ann]

I like this one, but not as much as I did the first one I read. Good work though still. I like the lines:

"Bodies too hungry to feed our minds,
So we feed on violence,
Our hunger overtaking our willingness to coexist, "

That's really good.

[Anima Inspired]

Masses of lives carved out of leftovers,
Bodies too hungry to feed our minds,
So we feed on violence,

--wow...this cuts deep.

This was a powerfully poignant piece. Again, I like the poetic voice...this could so easily be read aloud and make a huge statement. You write from a place of strength and brevity, and that shows through your use of tone and of description. This was raw and gritty, but wonderfully done.