Ham Sandwich

Bum Bum bum dunnadun.... Roy was my BFF's idea, obviousley..~*

“Thanks.” Smiled William, looking unnervingly into her eyes. “Do you want something to eat?”
Mary shifted uncomfortably. “Sure. I’m not really hungry. A ham sandwich would be nice.”
Mary and William walked into the kitchen, and he began to make the sandwich while she sat down at the table.
“So, I hear you and Victoria have been going out for a couple of years. How many?” asked Mary.
“At least four. I never stopped to count.” joked William.
“So? How much do you love her?” asked Mary.
“A fair amount.” Answered William.
“How many kids will you have? Will you ever divorce? If you do, will you remarry? Are you okay with dating people nine years younger than you?” Mary said rather quickly.
“Why should you care? I haven’t known you for a day. Get out of my life!” Shouted William angrily, then suddenly quieted down.
There was a silence. Then, a smiling Ms.Kindle came in with cookies. She looked a bit concerned, like she had heard a bit of their fight.
“Everything okay in here, sweethearts?” She asked gently. “I just heard some noise down here.”
Mary reached for a cookie. “Oh, nothing.”
“Just a little misunderstanding.” William said, and took two.
Then, Victoria opened the door and held out her hand, with a silver heart bracelet jingling on it. “Sweetie, look! I got this fabulous bracelet!”
William nodded and left the room silently. Mary bit her lip and looked away from Victoria guiltily. Victoria stood there and then went after William, wobbling on four inch stiletto heels.
“More cookies?” Ms.Kindle asked kindly, holding out the full plate.
Mary shook her head. “No thanks. I’m full.”

Mary took the phone and called up Roger.
“Hello, Roger speaking.”He said.
“Hello, it’s me, Mary.” She sighed into the phone.
“what do you want, Mary?” He spat.
“To see if anything changed.” She told him. “Like, are you still a gay b*****d?”
“Well, glad you called; I adopted a son named Roy. He is twelve.” He replied cheerily, ignoring her rash question. “Very sweet and shy, though hormonal as any teenage boy.”
Mary harrumphed bitterly. “Are you going to raise him with Mr.Pervelle?”
“Yes. I’m not marrying a girl. Men are hotter. By, like, twenty times. Can you come to the nightclub with me? As friends?” Pleaded Roger.
Mary said yes and hung up. She went to go choose the perfect outfit. At the party, she met Roy. Roy was just as nice looking as roger, with wavy blond hair and a cleft chin. Roy kept flirting as they kept drinking, wine and beer packs disappearing down their throats. Then, everything went blurry and black.
When Mary woke up, she had a horrible headache and bile in her throat. She groaned and turned around. Her head pounded against the cold asphalt floor of the nightclub, and so did the rest of her body. She was completely naked, except for her bra, which had one strap torn. The nightclub was empty, except for a few wasted couples here and there. Bottles of beer and wine littered the ground, and Mary’s clothes were draped clumsily on a chair on the other side of the room.
She dragged herself to her clothes and put them on. Bile rose in her throat, and her lunch splattered all over the floor. Holding her aching stomach, she called William.
“William?” She said weakly. “Are you there?”
He spoke into the phone. “Mary, are you okay? You sound horrible. Where are you?”
“I’m a bit worn out.” She sighed. “Can you come pick me up?”
She told him the location of a restaurant a block away, and waited there for William to come pick her up. Mary was ashamed for what she had done. She knew she had screwed with someone, and didn’t know who. William didn’t need to know that she had spent the night at the nightclub. Maybe she’d tell him she’d been at a friend’s house. Her w***e life was behind her now.
 

Author's Note

heh heh heh heh heh... MWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!