The Shadowman: 1993-2007

I RESISTED, but latched onto another boy. I eventually married him nine years later. While seeking God I was told I was a freak. Sadly, I put God on a back-burner ,again, and this time on simmer. I had connected with God just enough that perhaps the Devil took notice.

 

The first time I met him, in the shape of a man--though just a dark shadow--he entered my room. I felt his presence come sweeping in and he approaching me during a vulnerable state, clearly I would not be able to move until I could wake myself. I was sleeping on my side with my back to the door. He rushed in and was putting so much pressure on my backside and wasn’t letting up. It was one of those waking dreams that feel like someone truly is touching you. I finally shook myself awake and it was terrifying. I woke up praying, reaching for the light after feeling frozen in a terror hold.

 

The Shadowman haunted me for years and increased in strength. One time he tried to smother me with a pillow. Oddly, the Shadowman left me, shortly after I left my marriage. I had transitioned living with a church friend for six months before getting my own apartment. The Shadowman’s presence weakened. I would wake up before he’d get to me, unlike before. And he transformed, no longer a shadow, now he was an intruder with a unknown face. I simply told him he was not welcome and he left. I wondered what The Shadowman represented; perhaps he was a spiritual battle? I still needed clarity.

 

Desperate for answers, I prayed to God to make things so clear that night that I couldn’t possibly miss it. I promised to believe whatever was given as an answer. Sure enough, I woke up shaken. But, no Shadowman was in sight, but my husband and I were fighting and it got violent, not that we ever were violent, but perhaps it was symbolic of just how badly we were hurting each other, emotionally. In the dream my hand was being cut. I woke up with my arm in the air pushing him off of me. Not to make my husband into the boogieman, but God was telling me something.
I’ve not seen The Shadowman since. A reoccurring terrifying dream, gone. God had intervened.

 

Friends told me God would not give visions of confusion or terror... though I beg to differ. In the Old Testament prophets were given visions and they continually questioned God what they meant. Choosing to follow God is not all angels, sweetness, and happiness. It brings you trials, or perhaps a period of time of battle. God has an enemy who will try harder than God to lure or trick you ... or flat out scare the hell out of you. I finally promised God he would be on the front burner, always and forever, no matter what (or who) came along.

 

After The Shadowman was gone, my dreams continued to reveal things, though no longer in terror.

 

Reviews

[Tegon Maus]

I was drawn to this story by the title. I have a tenant that talks all the time about a shadowman who stands in the corner... watching her. If the washing machine leaks water on the floor, the shadowman did it.... a plug burns out... the shadowman did it. Broken window... the same shadowman is the culprit. She's elderly so I hadn't put much stock in it. I'm sorry to see she isn't the only tortured soul alone in the dark. I hope you find what you're looking for in your dreams... or at least some level of peace.

[Emily B]

I agree. Our dreams often tell of things to come--and sometimes bring terror.