Cold Truths Part 3

Chapter 50-2

Cold Truths

Part 3

 

 

But not everything was rainbows and roses; even though I had made friends, there were still problems that I couldn’t avoid. I think I mentioned that this church house had a basement, it used to be the boiler-room but was remodeled to provide two additional classrooms. It didn’t matter to my mind as the door opened I closed my eyes tight as I went down the stairs holding onto Shane.

By the time I made it down to the bottom I was paralyzed with fear. Standing in the dark while the lights flickered seeing the dark cement walls painted with light green; with red and white stripes in a wave-like patterned with the words of scout motto. In my mind's eye I saw the red paint drip like blood and the stale air smelled like the boiler-room.

All I saw was my father standing with his belt in one hand and the cattle prod sticking out of my brothers back. His bare back covered in blood and burn marks. I said over and over shouting;” it’s not real! It’s not real! Backing up the stairs quickly hearing my father laugh and sound of the tight leather as it slapped against his palm. I saw blood on the walls and my brother lying dead with a pool of blood around him.

His dead eyes staring at me, accusing me for letting this happen. I screamed. “No! No! Not again!” Backing up as quick as I can, falling backward, watching my father come towards me slapping the belt in his hand. Yelling at me to come and face my punishment. I screamed again as I backed up crawling backward up the stairs, his phantom coming closer.

Something or someone was stopping me, lifting me up from behind dragging me up the stairs as I watched my father come closer; I felt something warm against my back hearing the words while they restrained me against them. “Tiger, Tiger it’s not real! Come on say with me. “Tigers have seven black stripes, take a deep breath, and say it again. Tigers have seven black stripes” I knew it was Shane as I closed my eyes “black stripes” were to tell me who it was helping me through the dream. Moms were white, Kerry’s were green and Dads were blue. Even though I knew real tigers only had black or white stripes. It was color code to let me know who was with me.

I repeated the phase Tigers have seven black stripes.” Taking short controlled breaths, watching the phantom, retreat as I kept repeating back the next phrase “I Roar and I can dream because Tiger has seven stripes.” The person that was calming me would ask when I reached the next calm state. “Who is the Tiger that has the fiercest roar?” and keep asking me until I answer “I roar because I am the Tiger with the seven stripes” breathing slowly and repeat it until I could feel calm and safe.

When the dream or hallucinations ended I was outside feeling the warm sun on my face and chest. Shane was holding me Indian style. Until I was calm and no longer a danger to myself, feeling each breath and hearing the soft rhythm of his heartbeat. His bare chest covered with blood as he held me in his arms lying calm and in tune with his breath matching mine repeating back. “I am safe and my father cannot find me.”

The class was over as my three friends sat with me as our instructor went to find Dad and the Bishop. I feared Dad would take it out on me for disrupting the class and having to deal with me.

Dad didn’t say a word when Shane said. “Basement”

Dad nodded turned around and faced Bishop Lanwall and asked. “Whose idea was it to put my son in a basement?” The instructor paled seeing the size of Dad and his fierce rage. Nearly took the guys head off. Finding out he didn’t think a church basement full boys would be a threat.

Shawn said, “it’s the freaks fault.”

Dad growled in the instructors face making him step back. “I guess you were wrong. Church basements are off limits; period. Unless you want a repeat of this,” Dad said pointing to me and Shane. 

Bishop growled angrily at the instructor. “I warned you beforehand and you did it anyway. Don’t just stand there and lie that you weren’t aware. When there were other classrooms available or teach outside if you had to.” Bishop turned apologized to Dad stating this will never happen again.

Dad growled. “It better not, or I will hunt you down personally.”

Dad asked me if I was alright while I shook in fear, Shawn said “freak.”

Dad ignored him as he calmed himself telling Shane to stay here while he went to go find Mom dragging Shawn with him. I could see the tenses muscles tighten on Shawn’s arm Dad said loud enough for everyone to hear. “Your ground for eight months, and 20 laps each night and 20 more after school for a week, say it again and you double that.” I didn’t have to guess the condition of those laps. I knew he would be doing them in the buff.

It didn’t bother my friends much being it was the second time they’d seen this happen. Shane said. “This is nothing, but a small one,” and smiled seeing their eyes what a big one looked like.

Stan’s stated it was instructor fault, everyone knew perfectly well this would happen including him.” 

Shane growled, “I know, I have never liked the man and his stuck up sons.” I had learned that his sons were bullies at American Fork High School part of the popular crowd.

Stan, Charlie was both 13. A year younger than me and Ron, and currently attending Lehi Jr. High, The school I would be going to and with them since I had been held back an almost entire year due to some stupid guidelines enforced by the Rothwell’s. It was good to have made quick friends and schoolmates. So far it started to look like a promising year.

They didn’t ask when I would be going to school, because nobody knew the answer, but it didn’t stop me from having friends anyway. Mom came out almost hysterical and sighed with relief seeing that I was calm and collected with Shane and my new friends visiting. Dad said I was fine now and everyone was waiting on the other side of the building near our cars. I said goodbye to my friends Mom asking them what they liked to eat and what their favorite color was; Mom taking special note to tell their parents to be at our house around five.

Ten short miles could be an eternity when you hear nothing, but silence. Dad relaxed placing his arm gently around my shoulders, telling me he wasn’t mad at me. He was mad because that instructor wanted to cause an episode on purpose to see how I would react.

Promising that would never happen again; telling Shane there would be consequences if that happened again. Shane promised that it wouldn’t and he should have realized it before it happened, but the time we’d reached the bottom it was too late to act with everyone behind him and in front of us.

Shawn didn’t dare say anything as we got closer to the house if I was him I would have run home or run away just to avoid the punishment he was sure to get the seconded we entered the house. Dad controlled the monster in him begging to be let out. Dad told Shane it would be best if we waited here outside or in our room with the door closed; until it was safe for me to come out.

Shawn had already left the car was running around the house into the field. Dad ignored him letting him for my sake and opened the backdoor; making sure that Shane and I were in our room before he dealt with Shawn. I stayed away from the window letting Shane closes the blind and ensuring the door and window was locked.

It didn’t bother Shane that he still had blood on his chest and arms or the fact some of it had gotten onto his pants. He just stripped down to his boxer and putting our church clothes into the hamper and hung up my suit coat, placed his shoes next to my sneakers; motioning me to get on his bed so he could hold me in his arms, starting our breathing exercise, while we waited for the air to clear.

It was nearly two hours before Mom came to open the door to let us out. Mom had run a warm bath for me, so Shane could take a quick shower to clean off the blood. Dad had changed his clothes reading the Sunday paper in the Living room. The house was fairly quiet considering what had taken place.

Kerry was in the kitchen mixing cake batter and Jody was out back playing a game of tag with Jason and Jared. Arthur was doing homework on the table. He scowled at me, Mom just slapped him on the back of the head telling him to go into the living room and tell Dad what he had just done. For me, it was just average Sunday at the Rothwell home. Shawn, of course, was nowhere around.

I heard Dad in the living room moving quickly, and open the front door. Mom told me that two of them went out for some “fresh air.” Helped me put on my apron which had my nickname across the front with a picture of a tiger and set me to my task. I was good with a knife and peeler. It only concerned them when I was sleep or having an episode. Kerry smiled at me to remind her to check the cake in 35 minutes letting us share the spoon and set it in the dishwasher when we were done licking it clean.

It was almost hour before Arthur and Dad came back after getting some “fresh air.” Having Shane place Arthur in the shower and sit him in the family room for the time being. Arthur passed by and so did the smell of horse manure. His entire body was filthy and naked as if had rolled in it; his hair had clods of dirt in it. And his face had red blotches as if someone slapped him. Dad didn’t say word threw his clothes into the laundry and just took a seat in the chair facing the window and removed his shoes and socks, setting them on the newspaper he had been reading. Quickly set them outside the back door facing the field and the garden.

Mom frowned at him and the mess in the entryway. Dad just kept reading the newspaper asked Mom how long dinner would be. Dad nodded calmly stating him and Arthur came to “understanding.” And felt that he too would join Shawn in laps around the field tonight after supper. Mom sighed knowing it wasn’t worth the battle. The mess could be easily be taken care of. Grabbing a broom and asking Jody if she could quickly vacuum the dining room.

Dad calmly turned the page said. “Arthur and Shawn will clean up the mess. That she should attend to our Sunday meal; if Jody could take the boys and give them their bath now instead of later. When everyone is busy getting ready for family devotional;” Mom growled but went back to her business. When Shane and Arthur were done Dad gave Arthur the broom and pointed to the entryway. Sent Shane down to get Shawn and bring him up so he could clean the dining room and the shower room.

Moms knew Dad was breaking the Sabbath, but it was either that or sit through dinner smelling horse manure while eating. Dad stating rules are meant to be broken when it comes to children that disobey on Sunday. Shane did what he was told without saying a word, everyone knew better to anger the monster. Shawn came up with Shane right behind him he had some fresh new red marks on his butt; nobody said anything, just turned a blind eye and went about their work.

Mom still didn’t say anything when it came to her family being dressed for dinner on Sunday. Just placed a shirt and towel for Shawn over his chair; Dad picked up the towel and fold it set it on the counter with Shawn’s shirt. Mom tried to say something, but Dad just glared at her and told Shawn to sit. In the designated chair next too him; informing the family that Shawn had decided to remain this way doing all chores that the boys would normally do. Only to dress for school for two weeks including Saturdays outside; Or having a choice of spending three days and nights in the hot box. Then Mom reminded him we had guests tomorrow night. Dad said he won’t be joining us; instead, he will be in his room all-night down with the flu. The decision was made and it was finale.

I should mention what the hot box is stating it is just as bad as it sounds. Dad had built a small shed out in the middle of the field to store salt and feed for the horse. But when your punishment had gone on long enough and you hadn’t learned the lesson. The boy that is being punished is required to clean out the shed in the buff, and spend three days out in the hot sun sweating and three nights. He is given plenty of water to prevent hydration and given one meal per day. Hosed down anywhere to five times a day depending on the temperature or made to bathe in the horse troth then put back inside.

A bucket is placed inside so you could do your business without a toilet seat. It’s cramped and it smells really, really bad. I should know I had spent enough times in it. But it was better than being whipped with the cattail. For exercise to keep your body from seizing up in one small place; you would run 30 laps twice a day. It was dark secret left out on the brochure when you vacationed with the Rothwell’s.

When that particular punishment was given you were considered pardoned and your sins are forgiven, except for chores; but it did lessen the time you were grounded. One day equaled one month. Five days was the max. Due to school; the punishment would begin the second you got home from school on Friday. It was never given during the winter months when the temperatures were in the low 60s. You would then be placed what is called the turntable kept in the basement. (I will explain that one when we come to it. It also is not very pleasant.)

Thankfully Dad didn’t make Shawn stand in the buff to give his oral report or during family prayer. Instead, he was given a towel to wrap around his waist a small towel that would slip off frequently having to stop and put it back on. I can say I never had to experience it but did happen to Arthur enough times or one of the smaller boys. When Dad felt the punishment called for it. It was also very hard to look away without blushing, even though everyone in the house knew your body better then you did. So it shouldn’t have been such a big deal. Shane himself had experienced when he was young or younger like his two younger brothers. Dad would make you watch. You weren’t allowed to close your eyes or turn your head. Or you would be spanked and doing a full day's chores in the house in the buff as well.

Personally, that only happened once and never had to do it because Dad gave me only one warning. The trick was to look at a dot on the wall or keep your eyes on the persons face, or anything else in the room around the person. You could say Mom and Dad were creative when came to punishment when it came to any of the boys. Jody and Kerry were excluded for obvious reason, but even they got grounded. Shane too was excluded due to his age, but even he wasn’t immune from it, he was no perfect son and wasn’t too big for Dad to spank or ground and even going without a meal or two.