Feeling it

It happened one night.

When I saw you   I knew

 

You had that look  The look that said yes

 

We had only been friends  This now changed

 

My mouth went dry   Your heart pounded

 

You smiled so sweet   My eyes so bright

 

I walked to you   You stood your space

 

You appeared unsure   My breathing was not

 

I sized you up   The momentum moved us

 

You stood in your area   The game was on

 

I touched your face   You didn't flinch

 

You looked up   I could hear your heart

 

You smiled sweetly   I kissed your lips

 

We knew

Reviews

[Lorelei1969]

I love the way love is portrayed in this poem; the differences in the reactions, the knowing, the start to finish. When you know, you know and I honestly believe in most situations we know! I was able to envision the looks, the expressions, the gestures. Even writing this review I can picture each face. Well done!

[Ballpark Frank]

Oh my! Thank you! It was completely fiction but it flowed somehow. I appreciate you reading this. Very kind.

[ETERNITY]

Yes, it is a beautiful love story told in condensed form. The comments usually help me to write a review. I've experienced love unrequited and it hurts until it's justified. Thanks for sharing this "fiction".

[A Poor Player]

What an amazing love story. One for this age of disconnection and loneliness we're living amongst. Beautiful!

[Ballpark Frank]

Thank you kindly. I feel like this was just an attempt. I prefer to write short stories.

[Amy R]

What a beautiful write,
it reminded me of something that once made me happy but now its just a memory,
keep writing.!

[Ballpark Frank]

Thank you! I appreciate that but I actually prefer writing short stories.

[Amy R]

You're welcome, that's nice,
hoping to read a few in time.

[Ballpark Frank]

When you have time. I appreciate your nice review. Poetry is tough!

[Writergurl]

This is such a wonderful write, muchly enjoyed this

[Ballpark Frank]

Awwwww. Thank you dear. You're kind. I appreciate your thoughts.

[Writergurl]

not a problem

[fallon]

Oh, how unique! The way you flip flop…. You, then her…. Her then you….. and at the end the “we”!
It is sweet, creative and playful! A lot like flirting itself.
I very much enjoyed reading

[Ballpark Frank]

You are too kind. Thanks though. That's a great review.

[Silmara McGarry]

Such wonderful lines that get your readers into the energy of the moment it all happened. I really really love it.... my favourite was....We knew!!!!

Well done from me dear Franky
:-)))

[Ballpark Frank]

Thank you from my heart dear Silmara...sent.. I love your review!

[Light and ashes]

Good momentum.............

[Ballpark Frank]

You're a doll. Thank you from my heart.

[Light and ashes]

Bless you, you are so welcome.

[Annette Pisano-Higley]

“I sized you up The momentum moved us”

Loved the ‘dance’ of your words and your protagonists. Young love sauntering, yes. Great brevity, intensity, rhythm, flow, choice of words. Lovely teasing nuances. Lovely write.

[Ballpark Frank]

Oh my.....thank you immensely! You're wonderful.

[Ioana Mihai]

Beautiful poem. The title suits it so well. You have a way to put intensity into words. My kind of writing

[Ballpark Frank]

Thank you for your kind and helpful encouragement. I appreciate you!

[Ioana Mihai]

Welcome, likewise :)

[Samuel Dickens]

The game of love is fraught with dangers and doubt, but when it works out as it did in this poem, we want to leap tall buildings in a single bound. Slay dragons? Yeah, that too. Hopefully, there'll be no sorry end that makes us dive into a bottle.

[Ballpark Frank]

Thank you.Sam. I always appreciate your thoughts.