Darkness Embraced

We walk the streets

Of hunger and pain

We feel no loss

For it’s all in vain

No one smiles

And no one cares

For a town where life is a hectic wreck

For everything is lost

And even more is torn

Where innocence is unknown

And love is a disaster

Where the wind never blows

And the water is liquor

Everyone is drunk

In the darkness of the land

Where eyes of a cat

Can only see sand

This is the place where we all will land

In the land

Where darkness is embraced

With a dark crimson hand.

@all rights reserved by Ashley.M.E.

Reviews

[nyi]

full of emotion and well said description..but i don't get the part 'Where eyes of a cat can only see sand'..i don't know it's only me or not..but i don't get this..what does this mean?..but on the whole..i like the poem..first couples of lines are my favorite..oh and message me about the cat part..that is if you are free..i'm itching to know it!

[TadKent]

The concept is tragic, sppoky and deep, very nice.Other than the speling erros and word confusion already pointed out by Arra, very nice poem. :)

[Mistaken]

Wow..i honestly love this piece the most...just wow...amazing

[alesuriko]

First, I'd like to point out that in the third line, it should be "loss" not "lose." Also, in the 10th line, you should use "innocence" not "innocents." Other than those errors, the imagery of this poem is really intriguing. It has a vivid yet abstract way about it, very curious, I like it. Good commentary on society with strange ideas and expressions. Again the flow/rhythm are a little awkward in terms of random pauses but it is a good poem.

[chaotic katie]

great job nice emotion and terriific imagry

[Lucy Joan]

We walk the streets
Of hunger and pain
Very powerful beginning to the poem! I love it; these are strong and thoughtful words. I also like the tone; the image of darkness and numb indignation. Really awesome.
For everything is lost
And even more is torn
Where innocents is unknown
And love is a disaster

Haha, love this line.

[Emilia Kuemin]

I like it, your final line leaves a really dark and chilling impression, which I feel is what you meant to do. Very good. :P

[Crowley]

First, if others have not told you, nevermind, but in the third line "we feel no lose" should that be "loss" and in the tenth line either 'Innocence is" or "innocents are". Ok, that said, I really liked this alot, pain, regret and longing are a painful and potent cocktail when writing, and you used them well in this one. The last half of it was really powerful with some great images and very vivid emotive description that played well of the first half set up. I really like this Girly Q.

[Bridget Mcmaken]

I think this was a very good poem with a lot of strong words with meaning. Nice Job